CHRISTI HEGSTAD PH.D.

Tag Archives: coach

Reading Wrap-up: My Favorite Books Of The Year (So Far)!

Christi Hegstad May 25th, 2023

What is your favorite book?

I know, I know – such an unfair question to ask, especially if you are a book lover and/or voracious reader. How about this instead:

What’s your favorite book of the year so far?

That’s at least a little easier for me to answer. As of today, I’ve read 32 books in 2023, and a few really stand out. I’ll tell you about some of my nonfiction favorites here today; if you’d also like to know my top fiction picks, leave a comment below and I can certainly share those as well!

So far in 2023, my favorite nonfiction reads include:

Let Your Mind Run by Deena Kastor and Michelle Hamilton

This motivating memoir comes from a world champion distance runner who – in addition to massive training, great coaching, and incredible dedication – in large part credits mindset work and optimism for helping her reach elite levels in her sport. I so appreciated her drive, kindness, competitive spirit, encouragement of others, and courage. I listened to much of this on audiobook while walking (at a much slower pace than Kastor, I assure you! :-)) – a very inspiring way to read this one!

HumanKind by Rutger Bregman

A beautiful, scientific, hopeful view of our world and the people in it, all in one well-researched and thought-provoking book. Bregman shares so many facts, data, and stories that rarely show up in the news but point to the goodness of people. I loved the humanity inherent in the text and the focus on facts versus sensationalization. A powerful read, filled with great stories as well as actions we can take to continue improving our world and ourselves.

Quit by Annie Duke

I’m not sure how I didn’t hear of Annie Duke until this year, but I’ve since read three of her books in rapid succession! She writes from an interesting perspective of someone with a background in academics (cognitive psychology) as well as professional poker playing, sharing memorable stories and citing many top-tier experts (Katy Milkman, Adam Grant, Angela Duckworth, and more) as well. I found Quit so thought-shifting that we’ve dedicated this quarter of the ASPIRE Success Club to exploring the power of quitting and of persevering further.

A few other books I have enjoyed and learned from this year so far include:

Stolen Focus by Johann Hari

Coach The Person, Not The Problem by Marcia Reynolds

Bad Vibes Only by Nora McInerny

The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel

How To Decide and Thinking In Bets by Annie Duke

Have you read any of these? What’s your favorite book of the year so far?

5 Steps Toward Meaningful Work

Christi Hegstad May 11th, 2023

“I’m just a cog in the machine. A trained monkey could do my job.”

A client expressed this when we first started working together. His disconnect from his work had begun impacting his performance, attitude, relationships, and more.

By the end of our brief work together, he had replaced the above statement with, “My job actually saves lives!” He hadn’t changed jobs, hadn’t even changed most of his tasks and responsibilities.

So what had changed?

Finding Meaning In Work

A fair amount of research on meaningful work, mattering, and the like has been conducted in recent decades. It’s fascinating and important, and as leaders, we can do a great deal to create an environment of greater meaning and purpose in the workplace.

And as individual achievers, we have the power to bring meaning to our work, too. We can define what makes work meaningful to us, then take action to bring that to fruition. This article offers five ways to begin doing this.

Let’s take a look.

5 Ways To Bring Meaning To Work

1. Celebrate your wins.

Maybe you get acknowledged for the large, noticeable win – you land a big client or your proposal results in the grant funding, for example. (And maybe you don’t experience such acknowledgment, which is another article for another day.) Regardless, we need to celebrate our successes and wins along the way, not just when we reach the completion point. A few simple ways to begin this practice include keeping a Success Journal, recording a Daily Delight, and starting a Celebration of Triumphs list.

2. Connect your core values to your work.

One of my core values is growth, so when I can support my clients’ growth, or grow my own skill set in some way, my work naturally feels more meaningful. Discern your 3 to 5 core values, then look for ways to connect them to your work. (If you need help discerning your core values, contact me – I have a special one-time Core Values Coaching Session where we can do this.)

3. Dream big, and support others’ big dreams, too.

When you can connect your daily tasks to the bigger picture, you’ll benefit in all kinds of ways. Similarly, consider how your work supports others in achieving their dreams, too. Whether you are a banker or a chiropractor or a grocery store clerk or a museum docent or a (fill in the blank), you can play a role in supporting people on their path – and that feels fantastic!

4. Decide your ‘unofficial’ role.

One of my favorite tips for networking is to assume the role of ‘assistant host’; in other words, pretend you’ve been assigned to help people who look alone or uncomfortable feel more welcome. At work, you could decide you’re the one to bring the smile, to share an inspiring quote at the weekly staff meeting, or to ask thoughtful questions. Remember your values (#2 above) and personal strengths, then consider ways you could bring them into your every day.

5. Remember your ripple effect.

Whether or not you receive the feedback or see the impact your work makes, trust in the ripple effect – and that you are making a difference beyond what you even realize. Let’s say you take a phone call from an angry customer, talk them through the issue, and they leave the call feeling heard or cared for or at least a little less angry. Your actions could then change their interactions for the rest of the day, or how they handle their next call from a disgruntled customer. You just never know how far and wide your reach extends – but trust that it does.

You matter, and your work matters. I hope this article reminds you of that and helps enhance your experience, too!

Which of these tips will you begin implementing? What other ideas did this article spark for you? Share your thoughts below!

Q1 Lessons Learned

Christi Hegstad April 19th, 2023

After posting my Lessons Learned every month for a year or so, it has been a while since I’ve shared them! Today I offer a recap of lessons learned / relearned / affirmed throughout the first quarter of 2023. Can you relate to any of these?

1. Like in nature, much of life flows in seasons. Pay attention to the season you’re in and act accordingly.

2. It’s o.k. if you’re 20 or 50 or 80 and still asking what you want to be when you grow up.

3. Opening the windows after a long winter feels like freedom.

4. Two helpful morning questions: a) What do I most want to feel or say at the end of today? b) What will most help me do just that?

5. ‘Stay in your lane’ can mean don’t compare yourself to others – but it can also mean don’t spread yourself too thin. What is it time to let go of?

6. Even if the day doesn’t go according to plan, I am still better off for having created a plan.

7. Complaining does not equal changing. What action will I take?

8. A change in scenery can lead to an incredible change in mindset / perspective.

9. Just because the goal isn’t achieved in the expected time frame doesn’t mean it’s the wrong goal. Good things take time – and sometimes more of it than we think.

10. Inspiration truly is everywhere. Documenting examples daily is a wonderful self-care practice.

What lesson did you learn – or relearn – recently?

Was It All Just A Waste Of Time?

Christi Hegstad April 12th, 2023

After a many-year hiatus, I’ve recently gotten back into the hobby of cross-stitch. For me, it’s an ideal blend of challenging yet relaxing, structured yet creative, mindless (ie, when filling in blocks of stitches) yet meditative.

I love seeing a blank piece of fabric and some loose threads slowly transform into a work of art. And, since I spend much of my time in my head, I appreciate creating a tangible item with my hands.

I’m not sure why I stayed away so long!

And yet, like with anything, it’s not without its frustrations.

Take last night, for instance. I stitched for about an hour, then realized I was completely off count. Often when this happens (and for me, it indeed does happen often!), I can just alter it a bit and continue on. This time, however, the mistake was too noticeable and would have impacted the entire rest of the piece.

So, after an hour of stitching, I spent the better part of the next hour ripping out everything I had just done.

It’s hard not to feel like I just wasted an evening.

What do you think? Did I just waste an evening?

As you probably know, living with purpose is hugely important to me. It’s one of my core values, it’s part of my concise Purpose Statement, and it’s a philosophy I’ve built my business around for the past twenty years.

And this may sound dramatic, but one of my greatest fears in life is feeling like I’ve wasted – or have not been purposeful with – my time.

So to expend an hour, or an evening, or several months on a project with nothing to show for it … well, I struggle with that. A lot.

But the thing is, that’s also part of life.

We dedicate weeks to a presentation that ends up getting cut from the program at the last minute.

We invest months of time, energy, and heart into a project that doesn’t receive funding and gets filed away indefinitely.

We spend years of our rare free time writing our novel only to have it rejected by every publisher we approach.

Have we just wasted all that time?

As much as I fear wasting time, I also don’t think I really believe in wasted time. (I’m a walking contradiction at times, I know!)

Here are a few reasons why:

We gain something along the way. Sometimes an evening of watching reruns seems like a waste of time. Yet sometimes that same action can provide a level of comfort after a difficult day, or allow us to have a fun conversation with a friend about the plot, or even remind us that while we did that tonight, we don’t want to make a habit of it – so it causes us to make a change tomorrow. Being intentional (ie, ‘I’m ready for an evening of comfort shows’ ) can make a world of difference.

Progress can be just as satisfying as outcome. My stitching friends and I sometimes talk about being a product stitcher vs. a process stitcher; in other words, some people are motivated to finish and frame a piece, whereas others savor the act of creating. And like I say all the time in regards to goals, it’s not so much about the achievement as it is who we become along the way. Even though that presentation got cut at the last minute, we still clarified our points, improved our speaking through trial runs, met some fascinating people, and/or gained subject matter knowledge in the process.

We can learn from it all. ‘What’s the lesson here?’ is a question I have trained myself to ask sooner rather than later. Sometimes begrudgingly, and sometimes I’m not ready to answer it – but just knowing that someday I’ll glean a lesson from the experience can help me, at least a little bit, in the meantime.

I recently saw a line (attribution unknown) that said, ‘Time you enjoyed wasting is never wasted time.’

Maybe if we can apply that philosophy, along with the ideas mentioned above, we’ll learn to be more intentional with our time and also more grace-giving with the time we feel we’ve wasted.

What else would you add to this conversation? Share your thoughts, ideas, and helpful hints below!

We’ll be delving into this topic in our upcoming term of the ASPIRE Success Club – and more specifically, deciding when to keep on keepin’ on and when to quit. If you’d like to join us, we have a few spots left – click here for details!

New Routines For A New Season: My 5-Step Process

Christi Hegstad April 6th, 2023

I’ll admit it: I love an excuse for a fresh start.

A new year, the beginning of a quarter, the changing of seasons…even when things are going well, I take advantage of the opportunity to assess and evaluate.

The arrival of Quarter 2 a few days ago was no exception. Especially when coupled with the closing of a long winter, when my routines often included getting into pajamas at 5pm or shortening my walk due to yet another ice storm!

If you’re looking to shake up your routines for the new season, here are five steps I implement that you may find helpful:

1. Revisit Your Goals

You’ve likely heard the saying about climbing and climbing and climbing the ladder, only to discover the ladder was up against the wrong wall. Before deciding what actions you want to implement regularly, get clear on where you’re headed.

I like to revisit my goals for the year, then establish where I want to be at the end of the quarter. I can then create routines that clearly support my meaningful achievement, which helps avoid ‘busywork’ and reconnects my actions to my overall purpose.

2. Review What’s Already Working

‘Maintaining’ isn’t the most exciting phase of any goal, but it’s definitely one of the most important. Take a look at at what you’re currently doing on a regular basis that’s serving you well, then make plans to continue those routines.

Examples might include starting the day with an intentional morning practice, setting your Daily Top 3, or attending your swim class every Monday and Thursday after work.

3. Brainstorm Possibilities

As you look at your goals, what other routines could help you get from here to there? Brainstorm freely, keeping in mind you are only generating ideas at this point – not committing.

I like to brainstorm these in categories, such as morning routines, evening routines, weekend routines, workday routines, and so on.

4. Create A New Ideal

At this point, I pull out a fresh Ideal Time Map and a pencil (with an eraser!) and start jotting down my ‘in a perfect world’ plan. I choose a small number of my brainstormed ideas from #3 and play with where they might fit regularly in my day or week.

The eraser always comes in handy here, as the first draft rarely matches the final draft.

5. Begin, In Experimental Mode

For whatever reason, my mind continually veers toward all-or-nothing tendencies, which in this case would translate as ‘I must do all these things from now until the end of time.’ Therefore, I have learned to consciously train myself to view this as an experiment.

As such, I build a weekly review into my routine – time set aside where I evaluate and course-correct as needed. This offers the freedom to implement a new routine without forcing myself to keep it all quarter – especially if it’s not serving me.

Just this week, I implemented these 5 steps and have come up with what feels like a refreshing and purposeful set of routines for spring. I’m only a few days in, but so far, so good!

What’s a routine you’re starting or continuing this season?

 

 

Grit, Quit, or Let Go A Little Bit?

Christi Hegstad April 3rd, 2023
When I was about 12 years old, I used some of my babysitting money to buy a small plaque that sat on my desk until after I graduated from college. I can still picture it perfectly – the colors, the font, the phrase:
Quitters never win,
Winners never quit.
My inner achiever took this to heart. Perhaps like many of you, I often equated quitting to giving up, a thought that would cause that same inner achiever to cringe – and also to persist at some things much longer than necessary.
At times, there can be value in a ‘don’t ever quit’ attitude. In her outstanding book Grit, Angela Duckworth discusses the powerful blend of passion and perseverance, and how when those two factors come together, we can achieve beyond what we ever thought possible.
But even then, she doesn’t suggest being gritty all the time, about all the things.
Over the years I’ve become more curious about, and open to, quitting. Rather than a blanket ‘winners never quit’ statement, I’ve explored different perspectives like:
When is it actually in our best interest to quit?
What signals can point us to decide whether persevering or quitting is the better option?
How can we, as achievers, incorporate quitting into our goal-setting and success plans?
Can quitters sometimes win, and winners sometimes quit?
We’ll be discussing all of this and more in our spring term of the ASPIRE Success Club, and enrollment is now open! Space is limited due to an in-person component – though you can still participate 100% virtually as well.
If you’d like to engage in lively discussion with a brilliant group of peers, discover excellent books and resources (including the two that absolutely top my list on the topic!), and hear about some of the things I’ve quit and what I’ve learned in the process, join us in our spring term of the ASPIRE Success Club while space remains! We’d love to see you in the Club!

Celebrating 20 Years!

Christi Hegstad February 1st, 2023

This month my coaching firm, MAP Professional Development Inc, celebrates 20 years in business!

I recently came across the newspaper article (pictured) from 2003 that highlighted my new-at-the-time business, and I can hardly believe how much has changed since then. I have learned (and continue to learn) a TON, have met so many incredible people, and have definitely had my share of ‘Oh my gosh, I love this!’ and ‘Oh my gosh, this is so difficult!’ moments.

Our kiddos – a preschooler, toddler, and baby on the way (born about a month after this article was printed, in fact!) – are now young adults out making their difference in the world, and I am so proud of them!

With all that has changed, however, reading through this 20-year-old article reminded me of something that has remained the same:

Meaning And Purpose – the MAP in MAP Professional Development – is the underlying and overarching theme of it all. You matter, and your work matters. I am grateful for the opportunity to help people work with meaning, live with purpose, and achieve difference-making goals.

The last line of the article quotes me saying: “I feel blessed to be involved in that process with others,” and this is more true today than ever.

It really does take a village, and I am thankful for you all. <3

Happy 20th MAPiversary!

Permission For A Do-Over?

Christi Hegstad January 25th, 2023

“New year, new you!”

“Your fresh start begins January 1!”

“Make this your BEST YEAR EVER!”

We experienced a lot of this messaging leading into 2023. Now that we’re a few weeks in, what’s your verdict? Did you hit the ground running – or was it more like crawling?

Or stumbling?

Or napping with a side of ‘I’ll try again next year!’?

I love a new year, or really any fresh start / clean slate – however arbitrary. I was all set to kick off January with big, bold, full-speed-ahead action…but, as it sometimes does, life seemed to have other plans.

Where Are You Now?

Maybe your new year has started off just as you planned. If so, I am sincerely thrilled for you! That’s such a great feeling, and I hope you keep on keepin’ on!

But some of you may be feeling behind already. Whether due to illness or weather issues or unexpected home challenges or myriad other possibilities – or even no pin-point-able issue whatsoever – you may feel like you need a do-over.

I’m here to say, permission granted.

Your Do-Over

You may know exactly what your do-over requires. If not, here are a few ideas:

Let go of the judgment.

A big obstacle for achievers is the amount of criticism, expectation, and judgment we can lay on ourselves: ‘I should be farther along.’

Do what’s necessary to let that go.

This may involve anything from adopting a new mantra (ie, ‘I’m exactly where I’m meant to be’) to connecting regularly with a supportive friend to hiring a professional coach. Decide what will allow you to release the self-judgment, then put it into action.

Pull out a fresh piece of paper – literally.

Without looking back to goals or plans you had set prior to January 1, open a notebook to a clean piece of paper and imagine a fresh, new span of time ahead of you. What would you love to create, do, achieve, or experience?

Jot down – in your own penmanship – whatever comes to mind, not as a to-do list but rather as a dreaming-on-paper exercise. Capture the ideas before you start choosing, committing, weaving in previous goals, and action planning.

Focus on the quarter.

While I strongly believe in having a longer-term vision for your work and life, envisioning one year from now – let alone five or ten years – might feel overwhelming at the moment. If so, turn your attention to this quarter, and start crafting your plan from there.

Happy ‘New’ New Year!

Your fresh, new year can begin today – whatever day you happen to read this. If you’d like support in creating and achieving your new plans, consider reaching out for coaching or enrolling in our next term of the Bold Goal Academy.

And from my heart to yours, Happy ‘New’ New Year!

Meaningful Goals + Exciting Resolutions

Christi Hegstad January 9th, 2023
Think back, for just a moment, to ten years ago.
How old were you? What life phase were you in? What occupied your time?
Have things changed since then?
Have you changed since then?
This week, for just a moment, jump ahead ten years.
A lot can – and likely will – change in ten years. Including you!
And while we can’t control all of the changes, we can be intentional about the direction we’d like to take, the dreams we’d like to pursue, and the growth we’d like to experience.
Envision your ideal self ten years from now, then ask yourself what you could do now to start setting that vision in motion.
You may find yourself much more connected to – and excited about – your goals and resolutions this way!

My Top Ten Books of 2022! – Nonfiction Edition

Christi Hegstad January 5th, 2023

Narrowing down 100 or so books to my two top ten lists (fiction and nonfiction) is rarely an easy feat, and this year is no exception! Here I offer my best attempt in the nonfiction realm, however there are at least four other books that might swap onto this list depending on the day.

As always, these aren’t necessarily books published in 2022, just ones I read during the year. They opened my eyes, made me think, and in many cases, changed my behavior – the mark of some truly outstanding books, in my opinion! We’ll be delving into several of these in the ASPIRE Success Club throughout 2023 if you’d like to discuss them – and other awesome books – further!

4,000 Weeks by Oliver Burkeman

It’s always exciting when the very first book you read in a year ends up on your top ten list 52 weeks later! I adored this unique and thoughtful look at how we can use our limited time on earth – on average, about 4,000 weeks – to live to the fullest and make our difference.

How To Change by Katy Milkman

If you liked Atomic Habits, Grit, and Think Again, delve into this one ASAP. This would be an excellent book to start off the year with, however I read it during the summer and it was equally profound! Her research, compelling stories, and clear examples shine; I listened to the entire audiobook in a day followed by tabbing things left and right in my physical copy.

Braiding Sweetgrass by Robin Wall Kimmerer

This was the kick-off book to my 2022 expansive reading project and opened the door to a number of nature and environmental books for me. Kimmerer blends her Indigenous wisdom, environmental biology education, and parenting/life experience to form this beautiful resource. I highly recommend both the audio and print versions.

Why Bother? by Jennifer Louden

On my way to the bookstore for a completely unrelated book, I happened to hear Louden on a podcast discussing this one – and I ended up buying it as well. She flips this often-negative question – why bother? – on its head in the most compelling way, and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since.

The Soul of an Octopus by Sy Montgomery

I had no idea how fascinated I would become by octopuses this year (which, according to Montgomery, is the correct plural form of octopus – not octopi as many of us have thought!). I learned so much while being completely engaged in her story. Fun fact: one of my favorite fiction reads this year also features an octopus – Remarkably Bright Creatures by Shelby Van Pelt!

Tranquility By Tuesday by Laura Vanderkam

I have read so much on the topic of time management – including all of Vanderkam’s previous books – that I honestly wasn’t expecting any new insights from this one. I love it when I’m proven wrong in this manner! An excellent, fresh perspective for navigating time, and would make a great companion read with 4,000 Weeks.

The Joy Of Movement by Kelly McGonigal

My sister recommended this one and I listened to it on a series of walks – a fantastic way to take it in! McGonigal explores research and anecdotal evidence around exercise and movement in a way I’ve never read before, looking at it in terms of community, making a difference, connecting with the environment, and more. Super uplifting, insightful, and motivating.

Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green

I’ve heard Green’s latest book described as a comfort read, and I can see why. Written during the height of the pandemic, this book is part memoir, part exploration of simple gifts, part warm hug. He takes various things in the world – from teddy bears to Diet Dr. Pepper to Canada geese – and rates them on a 5-point scale. Both fun and thought-provoking.

Disability Visibility by Alice Wong (ed.)

This thoughtful collection of essays written by people living with a variety of disabilities opened my eyes to so much, and I am ever grateful. With honesty, candor, and grace, the contributors highlight both challenges and triumphs experienced throughout their lives, as well as misconceptions, achievements, and ongoing advocacy work needed to support people with all kinds of disabilities – both seen and unseen.

The Day The World Came To Town by Jim DeFede

Somehow this book, published 20 years ago and adapted into a Broadway musical, never made it onto my radar until this year. A fantastic story of humanity focusing on how the people of Newfoundland, Canada came together to support the numerous passengers and crew of planes that were rerouted there on September 11, 2001. Pick this one up to restore your faith in the goodness of people.

What were some of your favorite books this year? Share in the comments below!

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