Author Archives: Christi Hegstad

Does A Positive Life Allow For Not-So-Positive Feelings?

Christi Hegstad April 13th, 2020

“You always seem so positive. Do you ever feel down, worried, overwhelmed?”

Several of you have asked how I am handling this season. Today I want to take a moment to respond.

I am – like you, I suspect – experiencing the range of emotions that accompany change and uncertainty.

I am also reminding myself that, although certainly amplified right now, change and uncertainty are always present in our lives, and we are continually learning to navigate them.

Nice Human Coffee CH

In addition to the strategies I share regularly on social media and my blog, here are a few things I am finding helpful in this season:

Engaging in mindset work. Journaling, self-talk, choosing – and re-choosing – my dominant intention for the day, for example.

Dwelling in gratitude. It’s been scientifically proven, many times over, to be a mood-lifter and a meaning-maker, and if I’m going to dwell on something this seems a helpful choice.

Leaning deeply into my purpose. This is *always* the lighthouse I return to, continually reminding me who and how I wish to be in the world. (If you’d like more on this, join my email community ASAP.)

Walking. A lot. Often with a mantra, focal point (ie, birds singing or buds on trees), prayer, or an inspiring podcast.

Using my strengths to serve. I feel more empowered when I am helping to empower others.

I am also honoring little things that bring a sense of order, like making my bed, tidying my workspace, and engaging in my morning practice.

Positivity isn’t about constant rainbows and unicorns. ? I feel the full range of life’s emotions – acknowledging them, allowing them, and then asking where I want to go from there. I also reach out for help, magnify optimism, and try to shower myself and others with grace.

How about you? What ideas, mindsets, or practices are you finding most helpful these days?

 

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

Tell Yourself A Different Story

Christi Hegstad April 7th, 2020

There’s a funny and oh-so-true meme that has made its way around the internet many times over:

History Calm Down

Pretty accurate, wouldn’t you say? 🙂

The fact is, just saying “Change how you feel” typically won’t change how you feel. We need to start with a shift in mindset.

And we need to do it in a way we can actually believe.

How To Tell A Different Story

Our thoughts and beliefs (aka, our mindset) form our feelings. In turn, our feelings fuel our actions and behaviors.

At its most basic, the formula might look something like this:

 

THOUGHTS  –>  FEELINGS  –>  ACTIONS and BEHAVIORS

 

Changing our thoughts in the height of emotion can be challenging – kind of like being told to calm down when you feel anything but calm. However, with practice and a little forethought, it becomes easier.

To start forming a new approach, here’s what I suggest:

Pull out a journal, notebook, or piece of paper, and draw a line down the center forming two columns on your page.

In the left column, jot down some of the thoughts or feelings that tend to resurface for you but do not serve you. Some I’m hearing in my coaching practice these days include:

> “I am overwhelmed.”

> “I am worried about…”

> “I’ve never done this before – I don’t know how.”

Maybe even carry your notebook around with you for a while so you can record thoughts as they come.

Woman Journal Lake Book

Then, at a time when you are feeling strong, easeful, or capable, start ‘writing a new story’ in the right hand column. In other words, write a replacement sentence for each one in the left column – a statement that feels more helpful, purposeful, supportive.

Some examples:

“I am so unorganized.”  —>   “I am becoming more organized.”

Mindset shift: If a label doesn’t serve you, let it go – or rephrase it in a way that does serve you.

 

“Why did I waste so much time today?”   —>   “What will I do differently tomorrow?”

Mindset shift: Instead of letting your past define you, focus on how you are creating a different future.

 

“I don’t know how.”   —>   “I will learn as I go.”

Mindset shift: Fact is, there are countless things you haven’t known how to do in your lifetime. Recall some of those and examine how you figured them out.

 

“I should…”   —>   “I will.” or “I won’t.”

Mindset shift: ‘Should’ can be such a guilt-inducing word. Replace it with a decision.

 

“I am overwhelmed.”   —>   “One thing I can do right now is…”

Mindset shift: Sometimes the next right step can be the best frame of focus.

 

“I feel so stressed.”   —>   “I invite calm.”

Mindset shift: Decide what you’d like to feel instead, then focus your attention on inviting it into your life.

 

“I am worried about…”   —>   “I am thankful for…”

Mindset shift: In study after study, gratitude is a proven mindset-shifter and meaning-maker. Make a list of things you’re thankful for and review it / add to it daily.

 

“Everything feels out of control.”   —>   “What are 3 things in my control right now?”

Mindset shift: You have more within your realm of influence than you may realize. Watch for absolutes like ‘everything,’ ‘nothing,’ or ‘always,’ and learn to start questioning them. 

 

“I wish I could…”   —>   “I am glad I can…”

Mindset shift: Maybe due to quarantine, injury, or other circumstances, your plans have changed. Remind yourself of all you can do – maybe even things that you wouldn’t have done otherwise.

 

New Story Reframe

 

Keep it simple, and keep it believable. For example, you’ll notice I didn’t reframe “I feel so stressed” to “I never feel stress, ever!” but rather an invitation to a feeling other than stress.

The saying is true: When we change our thoughts, we change our whole experience. What thought isn’t serving you right now – and with what can you replace it? Share below or on Facebook or Instagram – you’ll be helping others, too!

 

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

12 Quotes To Inspire Positive Action

Christi Hegstad April 6th, 2020

I recently shared on social media the last three words of my Purpose Statement:

Inspire Positive Action!

Below are twelve quotes that inspire me into positive action, and I hope they do the same for you!

Countless people need your gifts Forleo quote

You have so many strengths, gifts, and talents – please don’t hold them back!

 

perfect time

Turn that elusive ‘someday’ into today.

 

Can't Edit Blank Page Quote

Just start – even if it’s an imperfect start.

 

Be a light not a judge Covey quote sun

Focus your energy and attention on what you’d like to see more of in the world.

 

Daisy Christensen quote purpose most important learned

Like a lighthouse that stands strong and shines bright regardless of the circumstances around it, so too is our purpose. (P.S. Want to write your own personal Purpose Statement? Make sure you’re on our mailing list to receive word of our next coaching group!)

 

Background - Sunrise color quote mandela hopes fears choices

Make decisions from a place of strength and beauty.

 

Trees Sun Brave Kind Gently With Fire Quote

You can be both strong and gentle – and both will serve you well.

 

Lake Michael Jordan Quote Fail Success

View failure as one of many stepping stones of success – one to be embraced rather than feared or avoided.

 

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No need to compare yourself to anyone; just strive to be your best self!

 

Good Day Gentle Weaving

How do YOU define a beautiful day?

 

Decide Kind Of Day Osteen Quote

Even when much seems out of your control, you always have the power to choose your mindset.

 

Nearing Quote Love Without Leaving

An especially helpful reminder during these current times, am I right?

 

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Wishing you a day – and a life! – filled with meaning, purpose, and positive action!

Let me know on Instagram or Facebook which one speaks to you the most!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

How Will You Earn Your ‘A’?

Christi Hegstad April 5th, 2020

In the book The Art of Possibility, Ben Zander shares how, at the start of the semester, he informed his students they would receive an A.

The requirement: in the first two weeks of class, they must write him a letter – dated the following May – indicating in detail all they did to earn that A.

I cannot tell you how often, and in how many situations, I have used this powerful visioning strategy since first reading it years ago!

This week, give yourself an A.

Place yourself at the end of this week, looking back. What helped you ‘earn your A’ for the week?

Or place yourself at the end of your current work-from-home experience, looking back. What helped you earn your A during that unique time?

Place yourself at the end of the quarter, the end of today, or even the end of your next meeting. What behaviors, mindset shifts, actions, and attitudes will help you earn an A?

Allow this vision to provide you with a possibility to live into!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

 

Ten Ways To Stay Purposeful At Any Time

Christi Hegstad April 2nd, 2020

In times of massive change, when even our most carefully-laid plans seem to fly out the window, we can easily feel like we’re on shaky ground, about to lose our footing.

Fortunately, even in those times, certain constants remain hearty and true in our lives. One such thing: Your purpose.

If you are feeling a bit wonky these days, perhaps one or a combination of these ideas will help you return to your ‘true north’ whenever you feel the need:

1. Pause before speaking / acting.

One of the greatest life distinctions we can learn is the one between ‘react’ and ‘respond.’ This can be especially helpful in times of tension or high emotion. Practice pausing – even just for a few moments – and choosing, with intention, your response.

2. Plan and prioritize your day.

Changing times can make planning a challenge, but the fact of the matter is, we always were and always will be adapting to changes. Mapping out key components of your day, such as identifying your Daily Top 3, can bring focus and deliberate action into your schedule.

3. Look for meaning.

Whenever we embark on something new, we often experience a burst of growth and energy at the start, followed by a dip, before reaching the goal or moving to the next level. That dip might include uncertainty, feeling stuck, discomfort … I often refer to this as the ‘messy middle’ with coaching clients. Seek meaning in the mess by asking yourself, “What am I learning? What are the lessons here?”

4. Help someone else.

“There are countless people out there who need the gifts that you and you alone are here to give,” writes Marie Forleo in her empowering book, Everything Is Figureoutable, and I wholeheartedly agree. Teach a skill, offer a kind word, donate time or treasure, share a social media post, ask “How can I help you?” You can make a difference in more ways than you know!

5. Review your Purpose Statement.

I do this on a daily basis and it never fails to bring me back to center. You may not always feel like you know what to do, but your Purpose Statement reminds you of who and how you wish to be in the world regardless. Let this serve as your guide when making decisions, choosing actions, or even simply returning to a place of calm knowing. (If you don’t have a written Purpose Statement, join my email community for upcoming opportunities!)

6. Connect with your core values.

One of my core values is growth, so I make sure I am growing and/or helping others grow on a daily basis. This growth could take place in any number of ways: reading, teaching, practicing a skill, trying something new… Define your core values, then look for and design ways to honor them.

7. Continue, or begin, your own morning practice.

How you start the day can set the tone for your day, so choose to start it on purpose! This can be as simple as a 2-minute gratitude practice before emerging from bed to a more detailed mindset/heartset practice. There’s no one right way – the best morning practice is the one you will actually do!

Daisy Christensen quote purpose most important learned

8. Engage in other daily practices, too.

We’ve been discussing this in the ASPIRE Success Club and helpful daily practices might include anything from meditation to going for a run to creating a meal plan to making your bed. Determine which actions help you feel strong and purposeful, then make a point to engage in one or more of them daily.

9. Move your body.

Stretching, lifting weights (or weighted items, like a bag of flour, at home), jumping rope … however feels good to move, move! I have gotten into the practice lately of what I call ‘mantra walks’: I choose a brief phrase and repeat it over and over with each footstep. Your body/mind/spirit connection is an important component of purposefulness.

10. Imagine yourself as ‘advisor’.

When you find yourself in doubt or questioning what to do, ask yourself, “What would I advise my child / partner / best friend to do in this situation?” This brings a level of objectivity while keeping you connected to your own inner wisdom, values, and purpose.

With all of these ideas plus those you generate for yourself, you might weave one word throughout: grace. Do your best. Seek your answers within. And shower yourself and others with extensive amounts of grace.

What helps you feel purposeful? Add your ideas below!

 

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

 

Everything Is Figureoutable: A Few Book Takeaways

Christi Hegstad April 1st, 2020

“You never get stronger if you only do easy things,” writes Marie Forleo. Does anyone feel like they must be gaining super-strength lately?

I am re-reading Forleo’s wonderfully empowering book, Everything Is Figureoutable, in preparation for some coaching and facilitation work this month. I love her no-nonsense, no-excuses approach reminding us that we are resourceful, capable, and stronger than we realize.

She also emphasizes the power and importance of BELIEF: Believing in ourselves and our ability to figure things out, even if we don’t always feel like we have the answers. 

Think of the people you admire who have made a difference in our world. “Could you imagine,” she asks, “if Malala Yousafzai felt she wasn’t old enough, privileged enough, or strong enough to champion girls’ education?” It all starts with our belief, with our mindset. And this is something we can change, influence, and strengthen – even when things around us feel uncontrollable and/or as if they are changing at a rapid pace.

“There are countless people out there who need the gifts that you and you alone are here to give,” writes Forleo, and I wholeheartedly agree. A strengthening and empowering book for sure!

Do you believe everything is figureoutable? What might change if you adopted that belief for a while?

Share your thoughts on Instagram or Facebook!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

Lessons From Your Future Self

Christi Hegstad March 29th, 2020

Are you in a season of transformation?

In changing and challenging times, taking one day at a time can provide a healthy focus. We can strive to take care of ourselves and others, honor our values, engage in purposeful practices, make our difference.

Simultaneously, we can envision our beautiful future.

This week, consult your future self.

In other words, when we emerge from this period, how will you want to describe yourself? What do you wish to see?

Personally, I am leaning on the butterfly metaphor and viewing this as a season of transformation.

I want to emerge a better, stronger, higher-level version of myself. You can see my latest Facebook or Instagram post for details on what that means for me, but more importantly, what does it mean for you?

When we emerge from this season, like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon, what are a few words you want to describe you – and how might you put them into action today?

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

Is Courage A Choice? 3 Purposeful Courage Boosters You Can Implement Today

Christi Hegstad March 27th, 2020

In a class I held recently, as well as in a poll I posted on Facebook, I asked a question:

Is courage a choice?

All respondents said YES.

Which raises another question: If courage is simply a choice, why would we ever choose otherwise?

As I’m sure you can imagine, various factors can come into play. Courage may (and typically does) require us to step out of our comfort zone, which is, well, uncomfortable. Like Brene Brown writes, “You can choose courage or you can choose comfort, but you cannot choose both.”

It’s easier to choose – and re-choose – courage when we have some sturdy tools in our tool kit. Hence today’s article! I hope you feel empowered by these three ideas that you can implement right away.

Coffee Journal Courageous Strong Gold Black

Determine your Courage Role Model.

When you think of the word COURAGE, who pops into your mind?

My Grandma is one of my Courage Role Models. She exemplified courage in how she persevered through challenges, maintained optimism in difficulty, cared for others and herself, found and created humor … and so many other reasons. When I need a boost of courage, I sometimes think, “What would Grandma do in this situation?”

Think of your own Courage Role Model, whether someone in your immediate life or someone who, from afar, appears to exemplify courage. Then ask yourself (perhaps in your journal) a few questions:

What qualities do they embody that I’d like to develop in myself?

If I asked them what helps build their courage, what might they tell me?

If they were in my current situation, how might they approach it?

Take your newly-discovered knowledge, which was with you all along, and apply it as needed.

Who is your Courage Role Model?

Woman Victory Mountain Sunset Success

Develop a Courage Mantra.

When my son played on the baseball team, I loved how fans and teammates would cheer and encourage each of the players as they went up to bat. One of the parents often used the phrase, “Say you can!”

It took me a beat, but I came to love that phrase. Often, when we feel less than courageous, it’s because our mind is telling us stories: “What makes you think you can do this?” or “You’re out of your league here,” for example. That simple phrase, “Say you can,” offers a quick and effective reply when your inner critic wants to say you can’t.

I have a variety of mantras I choose from regularly; everything from “You got this” to “Focus on today” to “This too shall pass” to “Peace be with you.” I often choose one before I head out on a walk, then match its repeating rhythm with my footsteps.

What is your courage mantra? How can you use it today?

Kind heart, fierce mind, brave spirit

Document Your Own Track Record.

The fact of the matter is, you’ve demonstrated courage throughout your entire life. But do you give yourself credit for it?

Sometimes that ol’ comparison trap prevents us from honoring our own courage. We think making that phone call we were scared to make doesn’t count – “It’s not something Hollywood producers would come knocking on my door about,” a client recently told me.

But – did you step out of your comfort zone? Did you do something you weren’t sure you could? Did you face an uncertainty or fear, stay true to your values, or speak up even if your voice was shaky?

That takes courage, my friend.

Create a list of 5 or more times you did something courageous and were glad you did. Continue adding to the list as you continue living your life. You’ll always have documented proof of your courage to look back on when your mind wants to convince you otherwise.

What shows up on your courage list?

Coffee Notebook Pencil

Which of these ideas speaks to you today? What other courage boosters have you found helpful? Share your insights with other courageous and purposeful folks on Facebook or Instagram!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

Inviting Inner Calm

Christi Hegstad March 25th, 2020

Every day or so, I am posting a Connection Question over on my Facebook business page. Sometimes they are coaching questions, sometimes mindset or positive psychology-related questions, and sometimes just-for-fun questions. My hope is that these prompts help you connect with your own wisdom and purpose, as well as with others in our outstanding and purposeful community. Feel free to join the conversation!

Today’s question: What brings you a sense of inner calm?

If you feel a bit wonky these days, you are not alone. This is a beautiful time to continue – or perhaps start – some practices that serve you well. Below you’ll find over 3 dozen ideas to consider:

Start a Positivity, Gratitude, and/or Success Journal

Stretch

Help empower someone

Read something inspirational

Visualize

Meditate (Insight Timer can be a great place to start!)

Meaningfully connect with someone

Smile for 30 seconds

Exercise

Black iron asian teapot with sprigs of mint for tea

Clean up your space (desk or reading nook, for example)

Set a daily intention

Pray

Create (ie, paint, write a song, bake bread)

Record 3 gratitudes

Remember and focus on what you can influence

Take an action toward (or set) a goal

Sing

Organize something (a bookshelf, for example)

Pet a dog or cat

Write and/or recite affirmations

Mindfully take in your surroundings

Ask ‘How might I help someone today?’

Femme et repos

Go for a walk (outdoors if possible)

Take some fun or clever photos

Do a power pose

Talk with an uplifting friend

Draw / doodle

Be a conscious consumer

Share ridiculous jokes with a friend or family member

Dance

Write in a journal

Listen to an uplifting audiobook, podcast, or affirmation reading

Tend your plants

Make a list of joyful and/or calming activities

State a mantra

Spa - Natural Alternative Therapy With Massage Stones And Waterlily In Water

Declutter

Take deep intentional breaths

Write (or read) a poem

Laugh

Take a bath

Choose a healthy new habit to start

Reach your arms to the sky for a few moments

Savor a beverage or food item

Put your hands on your heart

Review your vision statement, purpose statement, values

Ask yourself, “What do I need in this moment?”

Which one resonates most with you? Which one would you add? Share your thoughts on Facebook! And know that I am cheering for you, supporting you, and wishing you a day and a life filled with meaning and purpose.

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

Gaining Strength Within Challenge

Christi Hegstad March 24th, 2020

Certain times call on our inner resources in new ways.

We may be navigating various emotions, making unique decisions, and exploring different territories.

And, perhaps without even realizing it, getting stronger in the process.

This week, remember your strength.

A few things that may help:

Consider challenges you have navigated in the past. What tools, resources, mindset shifts, actions, and/or beliefs helped you?

Continue, or develop, practices that support your strength, such as positive self-talk, movement, music, or a morning or evening routine, for example.

Ask yourself new questions, such as: What would help me feel strong today? How can I make the most of this very moment?

Experiment with various ways to connect with others such as phone, text, Zoom, FaceTime, writing letters, and myriad others.

Consider leaning into things like optimism, peacefulness, kindness, random smiling, and so on.

At times when it feels like much is out of our control, we can benefit from focusing on what we CAN do. I recently posted a blog sharing 50 such things – feel free to read it here, use what serves you, and add your ideas to the list!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC is the Certified Executive + Personal Coach for difference-making achievers! Clarify your vision, free up time, and confidently reach bold goals with meaning and purpose! Contact us today for coaching, speaking, and Mastermind opportunities, or click here and fill in the blue box to join our email community.

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