What Does ‘Self-Care’ Even Mean?

Christi Hegstad November 5th, 2021

The conversation around self-care sometimes perplexes me.

We often hear it discussed in terms of spa days and vacations.

On the other hand, we also view self-care as eating nutritiously and exercising regularly.

I agree with – and am a big fan of – all of the above. I have felt the need, however, to define some form of happy medium when it comes to caring for myself. Something that feels a bit beyond meeting my basic needs, but also that I can realistically incorporate on a routine basis.

Not in place of, but in addition to, those items referenced above.

So I’ve asked myself, ‘When do I feel I’ve cared for myself well? What tends to help me feel my best?’ Below are some of the answers I’ve generated.

I feel like I’ve cared for myself when I:

* Set up my day as a blend of productivity and peacefulness. Not necessarily in equal measure, but both at least making an appearance.

* Complete or let go of a lingering task, rather than transferring it to yet another to-do list. Making the phone call, hitting ‘send’ on the email, cleaning the bathroom – whatever it may be.

* Create with my hands. This could involve baking a batch of apple muffins, typing up a new blog, or writing a thank-you card and dropping it in the mail.

* Say what I need to say. It’s harder, but seems to work better than, bottling things up or secretly rolling my eyes.

* Keep first things first, such as honoring my values, respecting my priorities, and not letting the little things get in the way of the big things.

I don’t do all of these perfectly, every day. But examining self-care through my own lens has helped me become more intentional about it, more regularly.

When do you feel like you’ve cared for yourself well? Consider journaling around this question yourself, and feel free to share a response or two below!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, earlybird enrollment to the 2022 ASPIRE Success Club, and more!

When Starting A New Chapter

Christi Hegstad November 3rd, 2021

A different role, relationship change, cross-country move … are you about to embark on something new?

How do you feel about that?

A new chapter can be both thrilling and scary. One minute you’re breathing in the fresh air of the fresh start; the next, you’re wondering if you ever knew anything about anything.

And all of it is natural.

While we often talk about the exciting aspects of a fresh start, we don’t always discuss the stickier parts. On that note, here are a few considerations as you begin your next chapter:

Give thanks for / make peace with the previous chapter(s).

This may sound a little woo-woo, but it’s important.

Your previous chapter was not wasted time. You learned, you grew, you developed skills that will serve you going forward.

Bless it for what it was, reflect (and perhaps document) what you learned, and know that it all serves a purpose in your bright future.

Acknowledge without dwelling.

This new chapter? It might be hard – really hard – at times. And that’s o.k.

We can acknowledge that something isn’t all rainbows and lollipops, even if it’s something we’ve worked hard for or dreamed of for years.

But we don’t need to linger in the difficulty, either.

Connect with your core values. Call on your mental strength, and continue building it. Trust in yourself and your ability to succeed.

Focus on your vision.

Yes, learn from the past. But let your vision of what you’re building take up more mental real estate going forward.

It may take a little while to get situated in your new chapter, and it can be helpful recognizing – but again, not dwelling on – that from the onset. Learn from your past, envision your future, and relish in the present moment. And don’t be afraid to reach out for help along the way!

What else helps you when embarking on a new chapter? Share your helpful hints below or on Instagram!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, earlybird enrollment to the 2022 ASPIRE Success Club, and more!

A Truly Meaningful Life

Christi Hegstad November 1st, 2021

What does ‘a meaningful life’ mean to you?

As in, specifically?

I could offer a few examples from my own definition, but they might differ from yours.

You are the expert on you.

This week, define ‘a meaningful life’ for yourself.

Grab your journal and start a big list of anything that comes to mind.

Then, begin discerning which of those items matter most to you.

Once you become clear on your definition of a meaningful life, you can then focus your attention on living and working accordingly!

Earlybird enrollment to the 2022 ASPIRE Success Club opens November 10! Click here to sign up for the Earlybird details!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, tools, resources, and more!

How Can I Help You?

Christi Hegstad October 27th, 2021

As achievers, we like to accomplish (and let’s be honest, preferably exceed) our goals, check things off our lists, make our difference, get the ‘A’.

And while we’re changing the world – or at least our corner of it – we can sometimes be a bit hard on ourselves, veer towards burnout, or find ourselves returning to big questions like “Am I on the right path?” and “What am I doing this all for?”

Are you an achiever? I am, too.

I am also a Certified Executive + Life Coach with over 18 years of experience guiding achievers to clarify, decide, and accomplish what matters most. I can help you:

* Uncover your values, strengths, passions, and purpose – then create an actionable plan for your ‘next chapter.’

* Clarify, prioritize, and design your most meaningful goals – and provide the accountability and expertise to help you achieve them.

* Design your personal leadership brand, so you can carry out your role – or step into your next one – with clarity and confidence.

* Decide what matters most, then set up your days, weeks, work, and life to honor those priorities.

* Experience, celebrate, and savor a meaningful career and purposeful life.

I’m here to help you answer those big questions, and in the most practical + purposeful ways possible.

I am currently booking new coaching clients for the remainder of this year and the start of the next. Contact me today to set up your introductory coaching consultation!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, tools, resources, and more!

Helpful Chatter

Christi Hegstad October 25th, 2021

How helpful is your inner dialogue?

In his new book, Chatter, psychologist and neuroscientist Ethan Kross shines a light on the differences between helpful self-talk and less-than-helpful mental chatter.

His findings are fascinating!

And many of the tools he offers involve ways to shift our perspective.

This week, practice bringing perspective into your inner dialogue.

For example, I might replace “Ack! Why do I never know what to do in this situation?” with, “Christi, what’s one thing you could do right now?”

This small action of replacing ‘I’ with ‘you’ or your name – what Kross calls distanced self-talk – can quickly change our focus and help us think through things more objectively.

And as we know, sometimes those small, simple actions can change everything!

P.S. Have you enjoyed my recent Mini Book Review videos on Instagram and Facebook? Be sure to watch for my upcoming one sharing my thoughts from Chatter!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, tools, resources, and more!

The Habits That Serve You

Christi Hegstad October 18th, 2021

What habits appear in your daily life that you are thankful for?

In our ASPIRE Success Club meetings last week, I shared a habit I began in January 2020 that is now one of my absolute favorites. I believe I’ve done it every day since then, and it has definitely made a difference in my life!

This week, start – or rekindle – one habit that you know will serve you well.

My aforementioned habit? My Daily Delight.

Each evening, I record one thing that brought me delight that day. It could be enjoying lunch with one of my children, meeting with an incredible new coaching client, or taking a long clarifying walk in the woods. Anything goes.

I now have a massively long list of Daily Delights that, in and of itself, is a delight to review!

Feel free to adopt this habit or start a fresh one of your own. Your future self says, “Thank you!”

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, tools, resources, and more!

5 Ways To Begin Building (Or Rebuilding) Your Confidence

Christi Hegstad October 14th, 2021

Sometimes low confidence is situational; ie, you don’t get offered the job you thought you were a shoe-in for, and you begin questioning yourself.

Sometimes it’s more foundational, like when a voice – perhaps even your own – has been telling you for years that you cannot achieve your goals or that you’re an imposter.

Let me assure you that, either way, you are not alone. Much of my coaching work addresses confidence, regardless of one’s achievements or levels of success. Most of us experience confidence dips at times.

Fortunately, we can take action to purposefully build – or rebuild – our confidence. It’s not a stagnant concept but one that we have agency over! Here are 5 ways to help you get started.

1. Keep a Success Journal.

In a nutshell, a Success Journal simply involves writing one ‘win’ (and you get to define what constitutes a win) per day. Do this for even three weeks and you’ll have a list of over 20 points proving your success – and strengthening your confidence as a result. This simple but profound step requires less than two minutes per day but, especially over time, can change everything.

You can read more about my Success Journal idea here.

2. Define confidence for yourself.

One person may view a sign of confidence as being able to speak to a group of 1,500; someone else may recognize confidence when they can speak up in a meeting of two. You may feel confidence as a straightening of your posture and an opening of your shoulders; someone else may feel confidence as a slowing of their heartbeat.

Don’t just adopt someone else’s definition of confidence. Discern what it looks and feels like for you, specifically.

3. Seek out a cheerleader.

The naysayers have a way of finding us all on their own, don’t they? So make sure you have a cheerleader in your corner, too – someone who will remind you of your past successes, support your future dreams, and encourage you along the way.

Side note: Being that person for someone else can be a great confidence-builder, too.

4. Scan your personal history.

When have you felt confident in the past – and what contributed to those moments? As you look over your work and life, what moments or achievements stand out as successes? When have you overcome an obstacle, stretched out of your comfort zone, or achieved a goal?

Make a list of these moments – what I often refer to as a Celebration of Triumphs – and start looking for clues, patterns, and contributing factors. Learn more and download a worksheet to support you here.

5. Connect with a pro.

You don’t have to figure everything out on your own! So many resources are available to support you in strengthening your confidence. Reach out to a certified coach, licensed therapist, or an experienced and trusted mentor, depending on your needs and situation.

I coach in this area daily, so if I can be of service to you, you are welcome to reach out to me!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, tools, resources, and more!

When Is It OK To Not Care?

Christi Hegstad October 13th, 2021

Years ago, I had the opportunity to talk on live television about my coaching work. I selected my outfit, a square-necked dress that I adored. At the last minute, I popped into a nearby store and purchased a simple, inexpensive necklace to complete the look. Voila – I was ready!

The interview was a blast. Afterwards, I thanked the hosts and crew, then hopped in my car to head to the office. I noticed my neck and upper chest area starting to itch, and a quick glance in the rear-view mirror showed a giant patch of splotchy redness all over my skin.

Turns out the cute little necklace I had purchased for the occasion contained nickel, to which I am allergic. This is not a dangerous allergy for me, more of an annoyance, and I knew (from way too much past experience) that the splotchiness would eventually disappear.

Later that afternoon, I watched a replay of the TV segment with some family members. And we also watched as, on screen, my neck and chest area slowly began turning red and splotchy throughout the interview! It was like watching the ripples spread from a pebble tossed into a pond, only much less soothing. 🙂 I could hardly believe what I was seeing.

And you know what I thought? Me – enneagram 3, Type A+, recovering perfectionist me?

“Who cares?!”

Past-me might have been mortified. Might have worried about who saw and what they thought. Might have cringed endlessly.

But this time? I really didn’t care. I shared solid content during the interview, offering practical tips that helped people. What I looked like, what my skin was doing as I spoke, was not what mattered most.

I care, deeply, about so much. I support causes that align with my values. I cry with others’ pain. I work daily to build a positive, purposeful world.

But I have to say, it felt good to not care about something so not-important in the grand scheme of things.

And even to chuckle about it!

But are there things holding you back that really aren’t that important, when it comes down to it?

Maybe it’s caring so much about doing something perfectly that it keeps you from even giving it a try.

Maybe it’s caring so much about how you compare to others that you lose sight of your own unique and incredible gifts.

Maybe it’s caring so much about the algorithm or how many people will ‘like’ your social media post that it prevents you from posting your meaningful content at all.

Most of us probably invest at least some of our time and energy fretting about things that, in the big picture, perhaps don’t really matter so much. Consider caring a little less about those things, and instead putting that energy into being your best self and making your positive difference in the world.

And maybe you can even practice this without experiencing an allergic reaction on live TV! To each their own. 🙂

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, tools, resources, and more!

Accepting vs. Settling: What’s The Difference?

Christi Hegstad October 12th, 2021

How do you tell the difference between accepting the way something is and settling for less than you deserve?

For a while now, I have been working on an article addressing this very question.

For a while now, my page has remained pretty blank.

Is it one of those things we just ‘know’? Or is that the problem – we think we’ll know when we’re settling but don’t actually realize it until much later?

To me, both require a level of letting go. The phrase “It is what it is” comes to mind.

Both can be challenging, acknowledging factors outside our control.

And I can feel a difference between the two:

Acceptance feels difficult, but also ‘clean.’ I feel an element of decisiveness with acceptance.

Settling feels more muddled, heavier.

But beyond that, I still don’t know that I have a clear-cut distinction. I do recognize its importance, however.

If you struggle with this differentiation like I do, play around with how each concept feels for you. Draft a list of words you associate with each. Perhaps even reflect on a time in your life when you accepted a situation and moved forward, and a time when you settled for less than you deserve.

Oftentimes, our own personal history becomes our best teacher. Especially when blended with our intuition and self-knowledge!

I’d love to know how you differentiate between acceptance and settling. Please share your thoughts below or on Instagram or Facebook!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, tools, resources, and more!

Start Over, Course-Correct, or Quit?

Christi Hegstad October 10th, 2021

If you make a plan – for a project, a trip, your day – and you hit a snafu, do you adjust and move forward? Or do you scrap the plan altogether?

I veer toward all-or-nothing tendencies, so I often want to choose the latter option.

I typically feel better, however – not to mention experience greater + more meaningful success – when I choose to pause, course-correct, and move ahead with a newly-revised plan.

This week, regroup.

Review where you want to be at the end of the year (or the end of this week).

Look at what’s working and what needs improvement or change.

Revise the plan accordingly and proceed with purpose!

Christi Hegstad, PhD, PCC, is the Practical + Purposeful Coach for Achievers! Join our email community for coaching tips, book recommendations, tools, resources, and more!

Tag Archives: coach

Give thanks for / make peace with the previous chapter(s).

Acknowledge without dwelling.

Focus on your vision.