How To Get Unstuck In 3 Simple Steps

Christi Hegstad April 24th, 2019

When I coach someone in a one-time Kickstart Session, I often start the meeting by asking what he or she most wants to gain from our session.

Lately, responses have by and large focused on two areas:

“I need clarity.”

“I need to get unstuck.”

These two topics intertwine beautifully – as in, once you progress in one, the other will tend to follow suit. Today I’d like to offer three simple steps to help you with that second challenge, getting unstuck.

What Is ‘Stuck’?

Being stuck very likely falls into that category of ‘you know it when you feel it.’ You may feel stuck in a rut, stuck in your career, or stuck in a lifestyle that no longer serves you.

You may also feel stuck in terms of hitting a plateau: can’t seem to grow your business, move up in leadership, or increase your income, for example.

And oftentimes, ‘stuckness’ takes the form of the proverbial hamster wheel: always busy, frequently exhausted, running a million miles an hour, yet feeling like you have little to show for it.

However you feel stuck, you know one thing for sure: It’s not fun.

3 Steps To Get Unstuck

Fortunately, you don’t need to stay in this frustrating, often confidence-depleting space, and breaking free may not be as difficult as you think. Give one of these steps a try:

1. Create A Breakthrough Map

The more you can get things out of your head (i.e., onto paper), the more quickly you can get unstuck. A Breakthrough Map – aka mind map or brainstorming map – works wonders.

I’ve written my step-by-step process for Breakthrough Maps here, so I won’t repeat those details. What I will say is that I create a Breakthrough Map probably once a week. It’s one of my go-to strategies when I feel stuck and also when I need to increase ideas, expand my mindset, or break any large project down into manageable pieces.

I often do this in partnership with coaching clients as well. The sense of lightness and possibility they experience is palpable! All you need to implement this idea is a piece of paper and a pen.

2. Step Out Of Your Norm.

Perhaps you have heard suggestions like “Drive a new route to work” or “Rearrange your office” and brushed them off as too simplistic. Science shows us, however, that even small shifts can start to create new neural pathways, ultimately helping us to view things differently, think new thoughts, and experience life from other perspectives.

So, take a different route to work. Eat your breakfast on the deck instead of in the kitchen. Take a healthy action that you wouldn’t normally take – or one that you’ve been putting off. (On that note, checking things off your list – experiencing a sense of completion – can serve as a fantastic way to get unstuck!)

3. Partner With A Pro.

Whenever people ask what I would do differently if I were starting my business now, my response comes to mind immediately: I would secure help sooner. Nothing keeps a person stuck like taking action after action after action and still not getting anywhere.

Everything changed for me when I hired my first coach – which is why, even after 16+ years in business, I still always have a coach!

You don’t have to figure everything out yourself. The objectivity that another person, especially a trained professional, can provide is an invaluable gift. You are worth the investment in your growth. Whether a coach, therapist, or other skilled resource, partner up. I bet you’ll start feeling less stuck even before your first meeting!

Which one of these tips will you implement? What other strategies help you get unstuck? Share your thoughts below, or on Instagram or Facebook!

Ready to get unstuck? Contact me today about coaching opportunities!

Your Goal Matters To Others

Christi Hegstad April 22nd, 2019

“You can want to be a top dog and, at the same time,

be driven to help others.”

Angela Duckworth

Dr. Christi’s Coaching Tip:

Early in my business, I had difficulty defining my ideal client. Since I focused (and still do) on personal growth and professional development, I naively thought everyone would want what I had to offer.

But as any entrepreneur will tell you, when you try to speak to everyone, you essentially reach no one.

A bit later I finally had a term for them: Meaningful Achievers. People who want to do big, bold things – but with intention, purpose, and in a way that benefits others.

That term has been with me ever since (and, if you’re reading this, probably describes you!).

This week, consider how your goal benefits others.

Moving toward a big dream or Bold Goal will likely require time, energy, focus, and other resources. This can leave many of us pushing it aside, thinking we can’t simultaneously achieve big things while also serving others.

Untrue.

If you struggle with that thought, consider how your dream can benefit those around you. Going back to school could allow you to do homework with your children and model good study skills. Writing your book could help others who have experienced a similar struggle feel less alone. Working with a coach could bring such a strong sense of freedom, confidence, and purpose that your team will want to follow your lead.

You can live a meaningful life of service and achieve boldly. You’re a Meaningful Achiever!

Every day I coach Meaningful Achievers just like you. Contact me to schedule a consultation!

How Do You Get Unstuck?

Christi Hegstad April 19th, 2019

A phrase I am hearing a lot lately: “I feel stuck.”

You might feel stuck in a rut, in your career, or in a lifestyle that no longer serves you.

You may also feel stuck in terms of hitting a plateau: can’t seem to grow your business, move up in leadership, or increase your income, for example.

And oftentimes, ‘stuckness’ takes the form of the proverbial hamster wheel: always busy, frequently exhausted, running a million miles an hour yet feeling like you have little to show for it.

‘Stuck’ is one of my least favorite feelings ever. Fortunately, although we all probably feel stuck from time to time, we don’t have to *stay* stuck. My April newsletter will share three of my favorite tried-and-true strategies for getting unstuck – be sure to join my email community (www.ChristiHegstad.com/#signup) if you’d like to learn them!

In the meantime, what are some ways you have found helpful for getting unstuck? Feel free to share below or on Instagram or Facebook – you might help someone move from stuckness to freedom and clarity!

Choosing Curiosity Over Judgment

Christi Hegstad April 16th, 2019

In nearly any situation, we can choose between two mindsets: a judgmental one, or a curious one.

For example:

Someone posts an opinion on social media with which you disagree. You might write her off as foolish (judgment), or you might ask a few questions (curiosity), such as genuinely inquiring what beliefs or life experiences led her to those conclusions. If you choose curiosity, you might learn a new perspective, or experience empathy, or practice respectfully agreeing to disagree.

Or maybe someone drives a bit under the speed limit on the freeway. You could assume he’s inconsiderate and a terrible driver (judgment) and expend a bunch of energy getting upset. Or you could imagine what else might be happening (curiosity); maybe he’s a teenager and has never driven on the freeway before, or maybe he was recently in an accident and it’s his first time behind the wheel again. You’ll likely never know the real reason, but wouldn’t a curious approach bring a bit more peace?

I had a client who was extremely driven. She frequently took on new projects, always went for the promotions, and did what she could to increase her paycheck. To an outsider, it may look like she put money above all else; she sometimes received comments to that effect.

To her, however, she was caring for her family: She vividly remembers growing up with very little, watching her parents struggle to make ends meet, and the strain her entire family felt around filling even their basic needs. She wanted more for her family, and she also donated a great deal to help other families find their way out of such challenging circumstances.

Someone who judged her on appearances would miss out on a beautiful story of overcoming – as well as a truly kind and loving human.

Curiosity is open. Curiosity is kind. Curiosity tends to lead to more accurate findings. In my profession – coaching – curiosity is an absolute job requirement. There is no way I could effectively coach someone if I spent the session judging him!

Ask questions. Seek alternative possibilities. Assume positive intent.

Judgment is too easy and too boring. (There. I just judged judgment! :-)) Judgment tends to lead us astray.

Where could you let go of judgment and replace it with curiosity this week?

Join our positive, uplifting, and curious community here!

Success Tip: Offer What You Seek

Christi Hegstad April 15th, 2019

“We all want the same thing: to feel comfortable with our choices and to feel validated by those around us. So let’s start by validating one another.”

Sheryl Sandberg

Dr. Christi’s Coaching Tip:

Oftentimes in my coaching work, once we’ve created a clear vision for the future and have begun designing the action plan to achieve it, we return to an important question:

What is within my control?

We cannot necessarily control what others will think, or how they will react, or the level of support they will provide. But we can control our own efforts in this regard – as well as our mindsets.

This week, offer what you seek.

For example, if you would like more recognition for your work, offer recognition to others.

If you would like to lead with greater confidence, help someone else build her confidence.

If you would like the world to be a kinder, more accepting place, extend kindness and acceptance everywhere you possibly can.

Do this without expectation. You may just be surprised at the outcome!

Clarity, confidence, accountability, thought partner…just a few of the benefits of working with a coach. Contact me to schedule a consultation!

Small, Quiet, Behind-The-Scenes Gestures Matter

Christi Hegstad April 12th, 2019

The behind-the-scenes work you do to ensure the event runs smoothly.

The kind greeting you give to the new person who looks uncomfortable.

The space you hold for your friend to share her grief.

The ‘thinking of you’ letter you send without any expectation in return.

The 85 million loads of laundry you have quietly completed.

The words of affirmation you offer a coworker when he thinks his presentation went horribly.

Often the big, grand, loud, or center-stage actions seem to get the attention. But the small, quiet, meaningful gestures – they matter, too.

Everything counts. Thank you for all you do, whether you are heaped with praise for it or not! You make a difference.

Ready to clarify your vision and achieve it with confidence? Contact me to schedule a coaching consultation!

Confidence In A Quiet Mind

Christi Hegstad April 9th, 2019

“A calm brain is the ultimate confidence tool.” – Katty Kay + Claire Shipman

Christi’s Coaching Tip:

In their excellent book, The Confidence Code, Kay + Shipman interviewed numerous leaders at the pinnacle of success and found several key contributors to confidence.

They also found that these exceptional, widely recognized leaders also still experience bouts of uncertainty, doubt, and lower-than-desired confidence.

We don’t just one day ‘reach confidence’ and never have to think about it again. We will be challenged, repeatedly, to step up our confidence game – even when we just don’t feel like it!

This week, find confidence by quieting your mind.

You might try a few deep breaths before entering a meeting, a power pose before walking into an interview, or starting your day with meditation or journaling. Experiment until you find what works for you.

Then, practice, practice, practice!

Here’s to clearly, confidently pursuing your best possible life!

Struggling to reach your goals, make strong decisions, or move with intention toward a crystal clear vision? Confidence plays a role, and coaching can help. Contact me to schedule a consultation!

The Productive Power of Your Daily Top 3

Christi Hegstad April 7th, 2019

Raise your hand if your to-do list runs longer than the Nile River.

(Trust me, your hand isn’t the only one up right now!)

If you’re like me, you rely heavily on – and perhaps gain a sense of satisfaction from – your lists. I’m not sure how I would ever accomplish anything if I didn’t write it down first (a phenomenon that seems to become more and more apparent with every passing birthday)! Love may make the world go ‘round, but lists help us get things done.

Long to-do lists do bring their own set of challenges, though. For example:

* They can interfere with a sense of accomplishment. Those tasks that carry over from one day to the next week to the following month? They drain our mental energy, plus we don’t get the satisfaction that comes from crossing them off.

* They can quickly move from supporter to dictator. If you find yourself feeling like the Tasmanian Devil from the old Bugs Bunny cartoons, spinning around in circles trying to get everything on your list done, your list may be driving you rather than supporting you. That’s both inefficient and exhausting.

* They usurp time. If your to-do list is pages and pages or screens and screens long, and you are sifting through all those items multiple times throughout the day, your list itself is taking more time than you realize.

And on a higher level, we can keep busy for a lifetime with our myriad tasks and to-do’s – and not make any progress on our big-picture strategies, visionary goals, and meaningful endeavors. The books we want to write, the events we want to host, the lives we want to impact… Those significant projects never gain traction if we aren’t intentional about them.

That’s where the Daily Top 3 comes in.

The Daily Top 3 is a simple, yet profound way to prioritize what matters most. Here’s how it works:

1. Create your various lists: Life List (aka, bucket list), 5-year plans, annual goals, projects, possibilities, tasks.

2. During your Weekly Review + Planning Session, lay out your tasks and commitments for the week based on those goals and dreams you’ve identified for the year.

3. Each evening before you leave the office, scan your to-do list and look at your week’s goals. Ask yourself, ‘Even if tomorrow goes completely haywire, what are 3 things I want to make sure I complete?’

4. Write those 3 things on a sticky note, placing it somewhere prominently seen and away from the rest of the to-do list.

5. Whenever possible, tackle those Daily Top 3 items first, or at least early. You’ll start the day with a sense of accomplishment and the knowledge that you are moving your important goals forward – not just keeping busy.

Once I started using the Daily Top 3 method, I noticed a curious phenomenon: I began to experience a greater sense of fulfillment at the end of the day – even on those days that did go haywire (which, in reality, feels like most days, right?!). Instead of frazzled and constantly behind, I started feeling more centered, prioritized, and clear.

If prioritizing doesn’t come easily for you, choosing your Daily Top 3 may take a little time at first. But you’ll get the hang of it (and if not, contact me for a coaching session). It’s not nearly as complex and labor-intensive as some of the A/B/C/1/2/3/x/y/z systems out there, and its power comes with its simplicity. You may even find yourself blocking the first hour of each day to make progress on those three items.

And once you become disciplined in the Daily Top 3, you will be stunned at how much time and mental energy this step saves you in the long run.

Give the Daily Top 3 a try right now, while it’s fresh in your mind! Look at your massive to-do list and ask yourself, ‘If I could only accomplish three of these things tomorrow, which would I choose?’

Record them on a sticky note, put it on your planner or computer monitor, and put the rest of the list away.

Then, relish the productive power of three!

Want to make better use of your precious time? That’s one of my favorite areas to coach. Contact me to schedule a consultation!

Making An Intentional Fresh Start

Christi Hegstad April 2nd, 2019

As I mentioned in this week’s Clarity Kickstart email, yesterday marked the start of a new day, work week, month, and quarter!

How often do all of these occur at once?! It feels very auspicious! 🙂

Inspired Action:

Today, set an intention.

Decide who and how you want to be in the world today. Then, choose a word to represent that intention which you can call to mind throughout the day.

For example:

Energized
Open
Calm
Joyful
Optimistic

Rather than getting stressed about all you need to accomplish, decide in advance how you wish to proceed through the day regardless of what occurs.

Consider setting an intention every day this week, month, or quarter, and see how clear and purposeful your days start to become!

Ready to truly clarify your vision and fulfill it with confidence? Contact me for coaching!

Fear Is Exhausting, Courage Is Exhilarating

Christi Hegstad March 26th, 2019

Coaching Tip:

What requires your courage at this time?

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Courage isn’t only applicable in times of physical danger.

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You might need courage to make an important decision, hold a much-needed conversation, step into a leadership role, or speak up in a meeting.

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Courage is not always easy, but like Eleanor Roosevelt suggested, it’s typically easier than spinning in indecision, uncertainty, and fear.

Inspired Action:

This week, choose a courage role model.

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Who comes to mind when you hear the word ‘courageous’?

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What advice do you think he or she might give you regarding the area in which you currently need courage?

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Consider what wisdom they might offer regarding courage, and begin to apply it. If possible, invite your courage role model out for coffee and get ideas directly from the source!

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Courage, clarity, and confidence go together like spring and sunshine! If you would like to build your courage muscle, contact me today to discuss coaching possibilities!

Category Archives: Uncategorized

What Is ‘Stuck’?

3 Steps To Get Unstuck