If I could sum up purposeful time management in a matter of words, I would say this:
Focus on what matters most.
Choose your highest goals and deepest values and important relationships, and prioritize your time and energy there. Like Goethe advised, never let what matters most be at the mercy of that which matters least.
If you’re unsure about your values, goals, priorities, and what matters most to you, please reach out. A one-time coaching session could work wonders!
Feel stuck in ‘same thing, different day’ mode? I love the distinction Twyla Tharp makes between a rut and a groove in her book, The Creative Habit:
“A rut is when you’re spinning your wheels and staying in place; the only progress you make is digging yourself a deeper rut. A groove is different: The wheels turn and you move forward effortlessly. It can mean all the difference in the world.”
If you’re in a groove, enjoy!
If you’re in a rut, what’s one small thing you might do differently today?
Need help getting unstuck? Click here and become part of our community!
In less than 3 weeks, we will enter the fourth and final quarter of 2018.
If you’re like many professionals, this reminder prompts one of two thoughts:
“One full quarter left? Better kick it into high gear and make the most of it!”
or
“Only one quarter left? Guess I won’t be meeting my goals this year after all.”
If you are in the first camp – or want to join us there – today’s 5-step process is for you. This simple but powerful exercise may very likely bring a greater sense of clarity and focus than you’ve experienced much of the year, as well as make your next best actions more apparent. Let’s dive in!
Step #1: Identify your primary feeling.
Close your eyes, take a few deep breaths, and imagine Quarter 4 is your best ever in all possible ways. You’re ending the year on a high note, where everything has fallen into place beautifully. How does that make you feel?
Open your eyes and record the top feeling that arises for you. Strong, peaceful, energized, successful, exhilarated…whatever came to the surface. Keep that word present (hint: weave it into your passwords!) for the remainder of the year. It may sound a bit woo-woo but I bet you’ll be surprised how much the reminder motivates you!
Step #2: Choose your goal.
That’s right, singular.
Choose one goal that will be your dominant focus for the remainder of the year. You will still achieve other goals, but select one that a) you commit to 100%, b) will up-level other areas of your work/life, and c) will help you end the year feeling what you identified in Step #1. Are you ready to take daily action on this goal?
Make the goal specific and connect it to your primary feeling, recording it as you will say it on December 31. For example, “I am so energized now that I have enrolled 10 ideal new clients!” or “I feel so strong and purposeful now that I have raised $75,000 for my nonprofit!”
Step #3: Brainstorm possible actions.
My favorite way to do this involves a Breakthrough Map, which you can read about and see examples of here. Once you’ve identified possible actions, prioritize them into a logical, doable sequence. Make sure this is on paper or Evernote or somewhere outside of your head.
Step #4: Secure support.
This is the time of year I am typically most thankful for my coach and the mastermind groups I belong to. These people want to see me reach my goal as much as I do (and vice versa), and that accountability, support, and belief in my ability spurs me like nothing else.
I currently have an opening for one coaching client in October, so if you want to experience firsthand what I’m talking about, be sure to reach out ASAP to set up a time for us to talk.
Step #5: Take inspired action.
Don’t wait until the perfect time, or until you have everything figured out, or until you have all your ducks in a row / i’s dotted / t’s crossed / cats herded … you get the picture. Take an action, then take a next action, then a next.
If you took one inspired action every day for 109 days, where would your goal be at the end of the year?
Wait, don’t answer that. Instead, take that action and find out!
I am a positive person. I tend to look for the best in others and believe that things will work out.
Some days this mindset comes easily. Other days, it requires conscious, deliberate effort.
Whether crime, natural disasters, personal betrayals, fluke accidents…sometimes the fact that we ever leave our homes feels like an act of bravery. I feel it, too. When my kids aren’t home and it’s 4 minutes after they said they would be, my mind can easily jump to conclusions. Even as a certified positive psychology coach, I can at times find myself wanting to curl up in a ball and hide under a blanket for a while.
And sometimes, that’s exactly what we need to do. We need to feel our feelings, even when they fall lower on the happiness scale than we’d like. Just because we experience fear, anger, doubt, frustration, or grief doesn’t mean we aren’t positive and purposeful. It means we are human.
But then, because we are human, and because we are here for a purpose greater than ourselves, we get up, take a few deep breaths, and do the work we were put here to do to make the world a better place.
I don’t claim to have all the answers, but here are a few tools and strategies, supported by research, that I find particularly helpful in those curl-up-in-a-ball times. I hope they help you come from a place of strength and purpose rather than doubt, worry, or fear.
1. Ask, “What can I control here?”
Whatever your answer, even if it’s something small, honor it. Maybe you cannot control the fact that your company is being acquired and your role may be eliminated, but you can control how you prepare for different possibilities or proactively decide your best action steps.
If the answer to this question feels like “Nothing,” employ one of the other strategies offered – and remember that you can always control your mindset.
2. Adopt a guiding mantra.
One I developed during a difficult time and still use today: Be alert but not afraid. I try to be prepared and cover my bases, while simultaneously trying not to let fear drive my decisions.
I wish I could say I adopted this mantra in my youth; the truth is, I have often allowed fear to have more power than I’d like. It has only been more recently, and with the help and inspiration of courageous friends, mentors, and coaches, that I have lived out this mantra more frequently. Feel free to use it or find/create one that speaks to you. Repeat to yourself in easy times so it comes to mind more naturally in the harder times.
3. Take an action.
Action truly provides one of the best antidotes to fear. Connect with a solution-oriented committee of like-minded people. Research accurate facts instead of automatically believing the headlines shared (typically without deeper inquiry) on social media. Join a group, attend a church service, write a letter to the editor, seek a second opinion, donate time or money. Saying “Something must be done” is not the same as doing something. Do something.
4. Calm your nervous system.
For me, journaling helps tremendously. For many of my friends, meditation, breath work, or yoga does the trick. Experiment until you find what supports you, then practice it regularly.
5. Ask for help.
Whether from a trained professional, a wise confidant, or a calm and trusted friend, know that asking for help is a sign of strength and courage – not weakness. I am not a therapist but have found them extremely valuable at various points throughout my life.
And as difficult as this may be during times of turmoil, see if you can laugh – even just for a moment. I so distinctly remember hearing Stephen Colbert say during his show a couple of years ago, “You cannot laugh and be afraid at the same time.” Funny movies, hilarious chats with friends, entertaining books, kitty videos on YouTube…treat yourself to a laughing spell to lift your mindset, so you can then choose your next best step from a place of greater clarity.
What strategy helps you keep from turning into a big ball of worry and fear? Please share your ideas below or on Instagram. Peace be with you.
A few years after starting my business, I joined my first mastermind group. I’ll be honest: I didn’t really know what it was, and I was actually a bit afraid to enroll, but everything about it just sounded right. After three years of trying to figure things out on my own and craving insight from other successful leaders, I felt deep inside that I needed to do this – scared or not.
Twelve years and numerous masterminds later, I am so glad I honored that feeling.
Aside from one-on-one coaching, nothing has propelled my business – and in many ways, my life – as much as participating in mastermind groups. And for the past six years, I have had the privilege of facilitating mastermind groups for high-achieving, purposeful women looking to accomplish a bold goal while honoring their values, serving their families and communities, and having a blast in the process.
The term ‘mastermind’ was reportedly coined by Napoleon Hill in his classic book, Think And Grow Rich. He describes the mastermind as the ‘intangible force, likened to a third [master] mind’ that forms when two or more people working toward a definite purpose come together.
“When high achievers are asked about the one thing that contributed the most to their becoming a millionaire,” Chicken Soup for the Soul creator Jack Canfield recently posted on Facebook, “participation in a mastermind is their primary answer.”
Canfield went on to share a great, concise description of the mastermind:
“The foundational philosophy of a mastermind is that more can be achieved in less time when people work together – focusing energy, resources, knowledge, and insights on creating solutions and opportunities for one another.”
In the masterminds I have participated in as well as those I have facilitated, I have always, always found this to be the case. Participants experience tangible, goal-oriented results as well as something even deeper: camaraderie, intimate trust, and lifelong friendship. Some of my closest friends on the planet began as my mastermind partners!
Masterminds come in all shapes and sizes: Some with revenue minimums and some without. Some with unlimited membership and some with a maximum of five people. Some costing upwards of $50,000 for the year and some for free. If you are considering joining a mastermind, here are a few questions to ask yourself:
What do I most hope to gain from my experience?
Before seeking out a mastermind group, decide what you want to gain from your involvement. Increased revenue? Completion of your book? To launch a nonprofit? Host your first live event? Friendship, laughter, and a true sense of camaraderie? People to bounce ideas off of and help you prioritize? Determine your mastermind goals, even loose ones, so you can ask about them before enrolling.
Who is leading the mastermind, and are they credible?
Don’t be afraid to ask the leader of your mastermind questions. Have they facilitated masterminds before? What kind of results have past participants experienced? What business or leadership experience does she or he have? This article may provide more ideas as well.
How much support can I expect?
How often will your mastermind group meet? Is one-on-one coaching also included? Is a discussion forum provided for questions between the meetings? Is your facilitator available to answer questions by email or during office hours? Will any training or content be provided? Know what will be available for you once you begin.
What do I wish I had in my work, business, and/or life – and can the mastermind provide it?
Over the past several years, my mastermind participants have expressed gratitude not only for the coaching and masterminding, but for unexpected gifts as well: “I loved knowing I had people I could bounce an idea off of.” “If I needed an extra set of eyes before hitting ‘publish’ on my blog, a Masterminder was always willing to help.” “I didn’t realize how isolated I had been as an entrepreneur prior to the Mastermind!”
What will ‘success’ look like to me?
As I mentioned, I have always found my involvement in masterminds worth far more than the investment – even when the investment was gasp-worthy. Part of that I credit to asking myself, prior to starting, “What will make me look back on this experience and say, ‘Yes, that was definitely worth it!’?” If your revenue increases to an amount more than the investment fee? If you end the program with a greater sense of clarity, confidence, or work/life balance? If you continue meeting with your mastermind partners after the program has ended?
Pursue the best program you can afford, even if it’s a stretch. I have gasped with nearly every check I’ve written for professional coaching and masterminding, which continues to increase as my business grows. I have always received a greater return on my investment.
Surround yourself with brilliance. Jim Rohn famously said, “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” Embrace the group that will encourage, uplift, share generously, hold you accountable, and challenge you to be your absolute best.
Make the most of it. Put mastermind event dates on your calendar right away and hold them sacred. Contribute to the private discussion groups. Engage in one-on-one calls with your mastermind partners. The cliche is true, you get out of it what you put into it.
Networking groups, book clubs, professional associations…you have numerous opportunities to grow yourself personally and professionally, and all of those are valuable (I have been involved in all of them since the start of my business as well). But none of those groups quite compare to the intimate, focused, trajectory-changing purpose of a mastermind group – I cannot recommend them highly enough! I encourage you to consider enrolling in one – even if it’s scary. Your future self will thank you for it!
We are now enrolling for our sixth Mastermind group, which runs from September 2018 – March 2019! Click here for more information and to request your application.
