Where Do You Learn Best: Mistakes or Successes?

Christi Hegstad February 3rd, 2014

CLARITY KICKSTART: February 3, 2014

“Conventional wisdom tells us that we learn from our mistakes. The strengths movement says that all we learn from mistakes are the characteristics of mistakes. If we want to learn about our successes, we must study successes.”

~ Marcus Buckingham

Coaching Tip For The Week:

It’s February… How are you doing with your New Year’s resolutions?

I firmly believe one of the reasons many of us struggle with resolutions and goals is because we create them from a place of lack. We ask “What haven’t I done well?” or “Where am I failing?” and set our goals from there.

This week, create a list of successes – what I call your Celebration of Triumphs. Write down at least a dozen “wins” you’ve experienced over the past few years, using your own definition of success as your guide. Big and small, personal and professional, expected and surprise wins, document them.

Then do two things: 1) Celebrate what you’ve accomplished! You have a great track record of success, and now it’s on paper.

2) Create – or refine – your 2014 goals from this place of success, abundance, and joy. When you start with a sense of accomplishment, your goals will become much more energized and in tune with your values.

What “win” appears on your Celebration of Triumphs? Share below, on our Facebook page, or via Twitter!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches leaders to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

Want to receive a Clarity Kickstart in your in-box every Monday morning? Click here – it’s free!

What’s your leadership theme this week? Share below, on Facebook, or via Twitter!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches leaders to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

Want to receive a Clarity Kickstart in your in-box every Monday morning? Click here – it’s free!

The Gift Within The Challenge

Christi Hegstad January 30th, 2014

My Mom was one of those special people who could melt an iceberg with her radiant smile. A vibrant woman filled with energy and zest, she lit up any room she entered, always ready with a hug and a hot cup of coffee. Just like the bright fabrics in her sewing room suggested, she lived life in full color.

Two years ago today, life as we knew it forever changed as my Mom took her final breath, surrounded by the family that adored her.

Two years can feel like yesterday and feel like forever. Today I reflect with great love on a few of the lessons she has taught by her example.

Be gracious. Open the door wide, smile HUGE, and let whomever is with you feel like the most important person in the world. Always be ready to share a cup of coffee (or 4). 😉

Be faith-filled. Don’t worry so much. Sometimes there is no perfect answer. Keep your heart open, stay true to yourself, and move forward in faith.

Be strong. The challenges, at times, may knock you down. Due to a rare condition, Mom had a lung removed over 15 years ago, from which she bounced back more quickly and robustly than most of us do from the flu. When you get knocked down, get back up. Even if it’s for the 600th time. You can do it.

Be loving. As a young parent, I’d worry about whether I was doing things right and asked her so many questions: “Should I do this?” “Did you ever do this when I was a baby?” Early on she shared the best parenting advice I’ve ever received: Whatever you do, if done in love, will be the right thing. Base all your decisions – parenting, work, family, personal – in love; let love be your guide.

Be bold. Mom lived in full color, literally and figuratively. She taught me the importance of doing what you love by her gracious example. Do what puts a smile on your face – and do it often. Use it to put a smile on someone else’s face when you can, too.

If I could have just one more cup of coffee with Mom, I feel like I’d probably ask her the 20 million questions that have come up in the last 2 years, to try to glean every drop of wisdom I possibly could from her. But I hope what I’d do instead is one other of her lessons – a challenge for a “do-er”:

Just Be.

Savor the moment. Live in the present. Embrace the value of what is. And if someone is with you in that moment, just be with him or her. Just be.

What I wouldn’t give for that one more cup of coffee with her. But when I wrap up in her quilt, or bake her cinnamon roll recipe, or spot her handwritten notes in the margin of a book, I am reminded of her life and legacy, all that she taught and gave just by being herself.

For the gift of her life, and that I got to be part of it, I am thankful.

“For this I bless you most:

You give much and know not that you give at all.”

~ Kahlil Gibran

With love,

Christi

What Kind Of Leader Are You?

Christi Hegstad January 27th, 2014

CLARITY KICKSTART: January 27, 2014

“Every one of us has the potential to be a leader every day.”

~ Levine & Crom

Coaching Tip For The Week:

I’d take Levine & Crom’s thought a step further: Every one of us IS a leader every day.

Think about the eyes on you at any given moment: your team watching your actions, your kids eyeing your behaviors, your “audience” monitoring your social media posts. You lead in many ways each day.

The question is, what kind of leader are you?

This week, choose a theme for your leadership. Will you focus on respect? Positivity? Integrity? Throughout the week, ask yourself how you’re displaying that theme in your words, actions, and communications. Let it serve as your anchor and guide for being the leader you strive to be.

What’s your leadership theme this week? Share below, on Facebook, or via Twitter!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches leaders to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

Want to receive a Clarity Kickstart in your in-box every Monday morning? Click here – it’s free!

Fly or Crawl – But Keep Moving Forward

Christi Hegstad January 20th, 2014

CLARITY KICKSTART: January 20, 2014

“If you can’t fly, then run.

If you can’t run, then walk.

If you can’t walk, then crawl, but whatever you do,

you have to keep moving forward.”

~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

Coaching Tip For The Week:

How are you moving forward towards your goals and vision this week?

If you are waiting – for the weather to improve, or for work to slow down, or for life to get less busy – guess what? You’ll wait a good while before the “perfect time” arrives. Possibly forever.

But what if you took one small action in the direction of your dreams today? What if you scheduled an appointment with a mentor, called a potential client, wrote a few pages of your book?

And then, what if you did that again tomorrow, and the following day?

This week, decide to move forward in the direction of your vision. Whether your vision is a cohesive team or a published book or a C-level position in your company, set it in motion today. As Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. also said, “The time is always right to do what is right.”

What action will you take towards your vision today? Share below, on our Facebook page, or via Twitter!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches leaders to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

Want to receive a Clarity Kickstart in your in-box every Monday morning? Click here – it’s free!

Feel Invisible? 3 Ways To Show Up

Christi Hegstad January 16th, 2014

I recently met with a coaching client who shared the following:

“When I speak in meetings, my ideas seem to go unheard – then someone else says the exact same thing, and ‘their’ idea is applauded. I struggle at networking events, too. In so many situations, I feel invisible.“

Do you ever feel this way?

Would it surprise you to learn the person who shared this is a very charming and gregarious man, large in stature with a rather commanding physical presence?

The fact of the matter is, anyone can feel invisible – regardless of their size, volume of their voice, or physical presence. Some people, like the client mentioned above, feel unheard and unrecognized at work; others feel that way at home.

And sometimes, if you’ve fallen off your own list of priorities, you may even feel invisible to yourself.

While the power of invisibility may be attractive at times (remember Harry Potter’s invisibility cloak?), in most situations feeling this way is anything but appealing. It can leave you questioning your worth and wondering if you matter. (You do, by the way.)

So, what are you going to do about it?

You have the power to make changes in this situation. Don’t think of it in terms of “how to not be ignored/invisible.” You were born to shine! Here are 3 tips to help you show up fully to do the work you were put here to do:

1. Believe in yourself and your ideas. Consider this scenario: you’re at an electronics shop ready to purchase a sound system, and the salesperson is saying things like, “Well, um, I think this would probably work, sort of.” If she doesn’t believe in the product, will she have any success selling it to you? You need the confidence in your ideas in order to “sell” them, which may require a mindset shift, coaching, and/or consistent daily actions that remind you of your value.

2. Focus on your delivery. Do you tend to mumble or talk too fast? Do you worry so much about saying the right thing that you often don’t speak at all? Do you state your ideas in the form of a question or preface them with “I don’t know, but…”? Get support (public speaking course, Toastmasters, or a coach) to improve your ability to speak clearly and firmly.

3. Watch your nonverbals. Focus on holding a strong posture (even when sitting), making eye contact, and fully engaging in the discussion. You do yourself a disservice when you slouch, look away, or give the sense that you’re cowering.

Remember, we teach others how to treat us. If you are tired of feeling invisible, now is the time for you to show up, play big, and do what you’re here to do!

What else could you do to show up and shine? Share your ideas below, on Facebook, or via Twitter!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches leaders to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

10 Ways To Live Lightly And Achieve Boldly

Christi Hegstad January 14th, 2014

I’ve learned something rather important over the past few years: Bearing the weight of the world is a hard, heavy, and unrelenting job.

Perhaps you’ve learned this, too.

If you’re ready to live lightly and achieve BOLDLY in 2014, here are 10 tips to help:

1. Surround yourself with positive people. Consciously spend time with those who uplift, challenge, and inspire you.

2. Say what you mean. Don’t make others guess, assume, or answer for you. Speak your truth.

3. Make decisions. Do the best you can with the knowledge you have – then get on with it.

4. Schedule an adventure. Always have something to look forward to on your calendar.

5. Enhance a skill… Choose an area that matters to you and invest in developing it to your fullest potential.

6. …But in the meantime, act as if. Whatever you most long to be – confident, well-spoken, clear – play the part until you’ve developed it.

7. Write your manifesto. What do you value? Believe in? Stand for? Get it onto paper so you can live and work it consistently.

8. Move towards what you want, rather than away from what you fear.

9. Let go. You can’t carry everyone else’s burdens and expect to fully serve.

10. Do what you love. Engage in meaningful work, cultivate deep relationships, and do what you were put here to do.

What would you add to the list? Share below, on Facebook, or via Twitter!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches professionals to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

Two Ways To Surpass The Competition

Christi Hegstad January 13th, 2014

CLARITY KICKSTART: January 13, 2014

“I knew I wasn’t necessarily the smartest person in the room, or the most talented, or the most intuitive. But even if I was surrounded by people who were more talented, I knew I could surpass them just by consistently showing up and doing the work.”

~ Jeff Olson

Coaching Tip For The Week:

How many times have you compared yourself to others – your competitors or colleagues, for example – and felt like you couldn’t measure up?

I’d like to offer two quick coaching tips this week.

First, stop the comparisons.

Definitely learn from your role models, competitors, colleagues, and anyone else you admire. But focus on bettering your best, not filling someone else’s definition of success.

Second, focus on showing up and doing the work.

Whether in business, sports, or life, it’s not the smartest or most talented that live up to their full potential – it’s those of us who show up, day after day, even on the days we don’t feel like, and do what needs to be done.

Make 2014 your NO EXCUSES year!

What excuse will you give up this year? Share below, on Facebook, or via Twitter!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches professionals to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

How – And On What – To FOCUS For Success

Christi Hegstad January 8th, 2014

In the not-so-distant past, I felt – for lack of a better term – completely frazzled.

Overwhelmed, stretched thin, pulled in competing directions, trying too hard to be too much. Remember that scene in the movie Up, where something as small as a squirrel sets them completely off-track? Maybe you can relate.

That was the first year I decided to create an annual theme, and I chose, not surprisingly, FOCUS. Focus is a critical skill for leaders to develop, and I find among my coaching clients it’s also one for which they yearn the most. I learned several strategies in my “year of focus,” a few of which I’ll share below.

Types Of Focus

But first, in order to determine how – and on what – to focus, you need to know what motivates you. In their excellent book simply titled Focus, Drs. Heidi Grant Halvorson and E. Tory Higgins discuss the two forms of focus that tend to drive us:

If you are promotion focused, you act in order to maximize your gains. That might include a desire to see progress, reach goals, stand out, or receive recognition.

If you are prevention focused, you strive to minimize losses. You act in ways that will help you stay safe, secure, or to avoid mistakes.

In other words, we either focus on winning or on avoiding loss. Which motivates you?

What Deserves Your Focus

You have oodles of things vying for your undivided attention, right? But of course, that contradicts the essence of focus: maximum clarity in a specific direction. You choose your focus in any given moment, but here are 3 areas all leaders need to develop:

When looking back, focus on the lessons. Often our tendency is to look for blame or focus on what went wrong. While you don’t want to gloss over reality, approach it from a “What’s the lesson here?” viewpoint. You’re less likely to alienate others and more likely to get to the heart of what matters most.

When looking forward, focus on the ideal. Begin with your ultimate vision. If you look only at what you think you can attain or base your future on what you’ve done in the past, you’ll only go so far. Create a clear picture of the ideal – then be willing to stretch and grow big enough to fulfill it.

At all times, focus on meaning and purpose. Don’t discount the importance of this factor. You, your team, and nearly all of us can act boldly, weather huge storms, and move beyond what we think is possible when we deeply connect with the underlying meaning and purpose.

5 Quick Ways To Increase Your Focus

Choose just one to start:

1. Remove the clutter. Close the many open tabs on your computer, pare down the paper piles, turn off any extra noise/chatter, and clear away the excess.

2. Create a daily Top 3 list. You can work from your massive to-do list, but select your top 3 priorities each day and focus on those first whenever possible.

3. Designate time to focus. For activities requiring creativity or deep concentration, block time on your calendar and honor it like you would any appointment.

4. Set a timer. Do this for tip #3, or for areas where you need to limit the amount of time you spend (email, social media, or surfing the web, perhaps).

5. Look for – then eliminate – distractions. Pay attention over the next couple of days to what tends to sabotage your focus. What are your “squirrels”? Your solutions may start with something as simple as turning off your email indicator!

The greatest benefit of focus? Without all the excess, you can pay attention to what matters most and to the people you care about and lead. Plus you’ll free up your path (not to mention your time) and find more peace, freedom, and purpose in the process.

What’s your best strategy for focusing? Share your ideas below, on Facebook, or via Twitter.

For additional support, check out our upcoming Create Your 2014 Success Plan workshop!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches professionals to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

Which Goal Matters The Most?

Christi Hegstad January 6th, 2014

CLARITY KICKSTART: January 6, 2014

“Success is found in doing what matters most.”

~ Gary Keller

Coaching Tip For The Week:

You don’t have to do EVERYTHING right – you just need to do the right things. What a relief!

With the dawn of a new year, many of us set grand intentions for changing all aspects of work and life. While the idea can be exciting – an important criteria in goal success – setting too many goals can also become overwhelming and lead to procrastination, frustration, and opting out.

This week, take a look at your goals for 2014. (If you haven’t written them yet, start there.) Ask yourself this question: If I could only accomplish ONE of these, which one would I choose?

Then, commit to taking at least one action every day towards that goal – and documenting that, too. Your consistent daily discipline combined with your focus will accelerate your #1 goal in extraordinary ways!

What’s your most important goal this year? Share your comment below, on Facebook, or via Twitter!

One seat left in the 2014 ASPIRE Success Club – click here for details!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches professionals to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

6 Things To Quit – and 6 Things To Start – in 2014

Christi Hegstad January 1st, 2014

Ready or not, a new year is upon us! Here are 6 things to quit (and, as I joked on Facebook, I apparently gave up the ability to count, too! 😉

And then, 6 things to add!

Here’s to your flourishing success in 2014!

Final chance to enroll in the ASPIRE Success Club – click here for details!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she coaches professionals to get unstuck and reach Bold Goals with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Learn more at www.meaning-and-purpose.com and follow Dr. Christi on Facebook and Twitter.

Author Archives: Christi Hegstad