When You Don’t Reach Your Goals, Part 1

Christi Hegstad December 11th, 2014

You set the goal. You made sure it was specific, realistic, and measurable. You created the action plan and followed through consistently.

The deadline arrives and…you didn’t reach the goal.

Ugh.

We’ve all experienced this disappointment. Sometimes we know what happened; other times it seems beyond explanation. I’ve had new coaching clients admit that they’re hesitant to set goals for fear they may not reach them. (We work through that fear pretty quickly.) 😉

So what do you do when you miss the mark? Wallow? Decide goals aren’t for you? Label yourself a failure and just quit?

I hope not. If that’s the answer, I should have given up on goals years ago!

Let me put this in perspective. Imagine your best friend is overweight and sets a goal to lose 100 pounds in one year. He exercises, works with a nutritionist, and does all the right things. One year later, he has only lost 95 pounds. Is he a failure?

When I pose this scenario in seminars, I hear a resounding, “No!” But he set a goal and didn’t reach it. Why is he not a failure?

Which brings us to the meaning and purpose of goals: It’s not about the goal, it’s not about the destination. It’s about who you become in the process. It’s about your transformation.

In that scenario, yes, your friend fell short of the goal. But he changed his lifestyle. He learned to make better choices. He lost 95 more pounds than he would have had he not set the goal.

And I’d be willing to bet he goes on to lose the additional 5 pounds, achieving the goal – just in a slightly different time frame.

(Now, I can hear some of you saying, “That’s all fine and good. But my job depends on me reaching my goals.” I’ll address this concern in Part 2 here on the blog next week, so be sure to tune in.)

When you don’t reach your goal, take some time to debrief. Ask yourself a few questions, like:

What lessons did you learn that you can take into your next goal?

Was the goal specific? Meaningful? Timely?

What did you do that worked?

What didn’t work?

What helped?

What might help more in the future?

As you move forward, make sure you set specific, meaningful goals that resonate deeply. Break them into consistent, manageable pieces. Take action every day – even (especially!) the days you don’t feel like it.

Make sure you celebrate what you do accomplish, even if it’s not quite to the level you had planned. Then, take a breather, get yourself in a strong and positive mental state, line up your support, and go for your next goal.

Dust yourself off, learn from the experience, and grow forth!

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Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As a Certified Executive and Leadership Coach and the President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she develops strong, confident leaders, helping you flourish with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

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From Good To Great To Transformational: Diane Hall

Christi Hegstad December 10th, 2014

If the average growth in your industry is 5% this year, what would you expect for your business growth?

If you’re average, you might think 5% is just great. If you’re Acceleration Masterminder Diane Hall, you achieve 36% growth…and the year isn’t even over yet!

A lifelong learner, Diane joined the Mastermind this year expecting to gain some new knowledge, but other than that she says, “I had no idea what I was in for.” Having succeeded in the promotional products business for 20 years, “I thought I was running a pretty good business, and I was. It was just good. But it really opened my eyes when my Mastermind team came up with ideas and solutions to help me make my business great.”

As a result, not only has Diane experienced growth nearly eight times the average in her industry, she has developed more effective ways of working, created systems to stay organized, hired new personnel, and taken calculated risks to grow her business.

“By setting a huge goal, even though it was scary and I thought somewhat unrealistic, it set ideas, events, people, connections, and a multitude of other things in motion in a way I could not have imagined,” Diane explains. “This experience has truly been transformational.”

Many of us strive to go it alone. We believe that we’re smart and capable and able to figure things out on our own – and we are. But Diane recognizes that we shorten the learning curve exponentially (not to mention have a lot more fun!) when we connect with others dedicated to success, support, and ongoing accountability. “I have implemented more changes in the past year, that provided the biggest impact, than I have in the last 10 years,” Diane shares. “Relying on others for support and advice has helped me refocus and keep moving forward.”

Through her promotional products business, Diane helps her clients acquire and retain customers, create brand awareness, reward loyal employees, and stand out in the marketplace. She generously shares her expertise with them and brainstorms solutions to their challenges – which she does beautifully in the Mastermind as well. Time and again she has proven the ageless adage: The more you give, the more you receive. “I always learn something in the process of helping others,” Diane shares.

Diane came into the Mastermind with an attitude of abundance, ready to lay her cards out on the table even though doing so can be frightening. But she knew that to gain the most from her experience, she needed to do two important things: Give generously and be willing to be vulnerable. Her fellow Masterminders shared those beliefs, leading to expansive growth for the entire group – both professionally and personally. “The synergy that has developed in the Acceleration Mastermind group has really propelled each of us forward,” according to Diane. “I can see a change in myself as well as growth in the others in our group. It really is an amazing process.”

Learn more about Diane Hall and Promotions Plus, LLC, at www.promotionsplus.biz.

To find out how the Acceleration Mastermind and/or coaching can help you, click here.

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Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As a Certified Executive and Leadership Coach and the President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she develops strong, confident leaders, helping you flourish with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Receive helpful articles, resources, and 5 insightful audios – for free! Click “Join Our Mailing List” above.

Learn more about Dr. Christi and MAP Inc. at www.meaning-and-purpose.com, on Facebook, or via Twitter.

Becoming A Full Contributor In The World

Christi Hegstad December 8th, 2014

CLARITY KICKSTART: December 8, 2014

“I wasn’t fully contributing to the world if I was pulling back from it all the time.”

Noelle Hancock

Coaching Tip for the Week:

In a recent coaching meeting, one of my clients shared her desire to become the leader of her division at work. She lit up talking about possibilities and described how amazing it would be to go to work each day in that scenario.

Then her voice softened and she said, “But what if I put myself ‘out there’ and it doesn’t work?”

Fear has a sneaky way of holding us back – especially when something is really important to us. Even the most confident among us can feel it’s “safer” to stay put rather than risk striving for more and falling short.

This week, practice putting yourself ‘out there.’ Strike up a conversation when you might normally stay silent, apply for the leadership position, try that new hobby. Reach out for support (for some ideas, click here), then enjoy becoming a fully involved and engaged person – one who makes the world better by modeling courage for the rest of us.

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Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As a Certified Executive and Leadership Coach and the President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she develops strong, confident leaders, helping you flourish with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Receive helpful articles, resources, and 5 insightful audios – for free! Click “Join Our Mailing List” above.

Learn more about Dr. Christi and MAP Inc. at www.meaning-and-purpose.com, on Facebook, or via Twitter.

Leadership, Purpose, and My Ukulele Debut

Christi Hegstad December 4th, 2014

This summer I took on a project that I dubbed 42 Days Of Yes. Every day for 42 days, I said YES to a healthy opportunity that either pushed me out of my comfort zone, strengthened an important relationship, or was totally just-for-fun but to which I might normally say No.

One day, for no apparent reason, I said YES to a ukulele lesson. Lucky for me, my sister is an extraordinary musician whom I happened to be visiting. She taught me a song and was quickly dubbed the most patient teacher ever.

And I was hooked! When I returned to Iowa, I purchased a ukulele, printed a chord chart, and watched some of my favorite ukulele players (Steve Martin and Eddie Vedder, for example) work their magic on YouTube. My family supported my new passion while periodically begging me to learn at least ONE different song. 🙂

Fast-forward two months: I am leading Spark, our one-day leadership workshop, guiding nearly 100 professional women to live, work, and lead with clarity and courage. A big part of bold leadership involves taking healthy risks, trying new things, and being able to grow through the experience – even if it’s not perfect. So toward the end of the Spark day, I modeled what I was teaching in a perhaps unconventional yet meaningful way: I pulled out my trusty ukulele and played (and sang!) a song. I did it imperfectly, but I survived, and even received a standing ovation from the kind and generous attendees.

While the ukulele recording offers haven’t been rolling in (yet!), I *have* heard from the Spark participants about the bold, courageous actions they are taking to pursue their dreams, make a difference, and change the world. Two are applying to grad school. One is finally meeting with a book publisher after years of “I need to do this.” Others have taken on challenging new leadership roles, begun their own version of 42 Days Of Yes, hired coaches, started businesses, and more.

And do you know what at least half of them have mentioned when sharing their wins with me? “I just thought, if *you* can play the ukulele in front of this crowd after just 3 lessons, surely *I* can hit ‘Send’ on an email / make a phone call / take the first step.”

And therein lies the purpose.

Marianne Williamson once wrote, “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be?”

Where are you holding back? Where are you playing small? What are you not doing because you might look ridiculous, or may even fail?

Your passions link directly to your purpose. I challenge you to say YES to a healthy opportunity that delights you, stretches you, and brings a little more joy into your world. Give yourself permission to do it imperfectly. Reach inside your depths for the courage to embrace your work and life wholeheartedly, even if it’s a little scary or uncertain at times.

And if your YES requires a ukulele performer, you know who to call. 😉

You can read about many of my 42 Days Of Yes adventures here on the blog – just click “42 Days Of Yes” under the Tags & Categories section.

Spark photo credit: Kris Gaspari Photography

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Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As a Certified Executive and Leadership Coach and the President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she develops strong, confident leaders, helping you flourish with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Receive helpful articles, resources, and 5 insightful audios – for free! Click “Join Our Mailing List” above.

Learn more about Dr. Christi and MAP Inc. at www.meaning-and-purpose.com, on Facebook, or via Twitter.

Are People Meeting Your Expectations?

Christi Hegstad December 1st, 2014

CLARITY KICKSTART: December 1, 2014

“[Nelson Mandela] chooses to look past the negative for two reasons: because he instinctively sees the good in people and because he intellectually believes that seeing the good in others might actually make them better.”

Richard Stengel

Coaching Tip for the Week:

(For more on the book from which the above quote stems, click here.)

Do you believe that if you hold high expectations of others, they will strive to meet them?

Over the years, I have coached professionals in nearly all industries, from health care providers to attorneys to school teachers to government officials and more. We have tested Mandela’s theory in a variety of ways and have found it to be true nearly every time: People rise to our level of expectation.

If we expect our team to be surly or apathetic, that’s what we’ll experience. And if we expect them to contribute and act as leaders, provided they have the necessary knowledge and skills, that’s also what we’ll experience.

This week, begin creating the environment to support your raised expectations. The #1 place to start? Model the behavior you wish to see in others. Raise the bar, let others see you meeting it, then support them in reaching that higher level of success in whatever ways you can. You will all come out winners!

Surround yourself with positive people who support your continued growth! Click here to enroll in the ASPIRE Success Club.

Share your thoughts below, on our Facebook page, or via Twitter!

Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As a Certified Executive and Leadership Coach and the President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she develops strong, confident leaders, helping you flourish with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.

Receive helpful articles, resources, and 5 insightful audios – for free! Click “Join Our Mailing List” above.

Learn more about Dr. Christi and MAP Inc. at www.meaning-and-purpose.com, on Facebook, or via Twitter.

How To Be A Go-Giver

Christi Hegstad November 26th, 2014

This post was originally published by the Des Moines Business Record.

“I hate selling.”

How many times have you heard that frustration from an employee, or even said it yourself?

It’s especially common among entrepreneurs: You start a business because you’re passionate about your product or service and want to make a difference. But you’d prefer clients just find you, because selling, in its traditional sense, can feel cheesy, manipulative, and inauthentic.

But what if you didn’t worry about the sale? What if you focused solely on adding value instead?

Such is the premise of Bob Burg & John David Mann’s bestselling book, The Go-Giver, and its follow-up, Go-Givers Sell More. In the first book, the authors share a story about a true go-getter: Joe works crazy hours and holds a “whatever it takes” attitude to make the sale. He hits a wall, however, and – with ulterior motives in mind – schedules a meeting with a hugely successful bigwig, Pindar.

Pindar volunteers to share his sales secrets with Joe over the course of a week. Instead of focusing on topics like how to close a deal, however, Pindar offers five Laws of Stratospheric Success:

The Law of Value: Your true worth is determined by how much more you give in value than you take in payment.
The Law of Compensation: Your income is determined by how many people you serve and how well you serve them.
The Law of Influence: Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.
The Law of Authenticity: The most valuable gift you have to offer is yourself.
The Law of Receptivity: The key to effective giving is to stay open to receiving.

In a nutshell: Focus on giving.

The follow-up book takes these five laws and provides real-life examples, best practices, and solid ways to implement them into your own work.

Most of us know that success in life comes when we serve graciously, give generously, and focus on making the world a better place. The authors have done a great job reminding us that these same principles lead to success in business, too – in terms of satisfaction, morale, and revenue.

So how does one become a go-giver?

Listen more than speak.

Add value more than promote your product – which sometimes means saying, “I know someone else who can better help you.”

Above all, remember: It’s not about you. It’s not even about your product or service. When you make it about you, you’ll struggle.

Then what is it about? According to Burg & Mann:

“It’s about adding value to the other person’s life. Your product may be one vehicle for doing that, one among dozens. Yet a person may never actually buy your product and still have his life changed by meeting you and getting to know you. And that person – even though he never actually becomes a ‘customer’ – will refer many others to you.”

I first read The Go-Giver several years ago and implemented a practice that I encourage you to adopt: Do a go-giver activity first thing each morning. Send a card to someone, just to let her know you’re thinking of her. Leave a voicemail for a colleague wishing him a great day. Mail a newspaper clipping to a local businessperson recently highlighted. Write an unexpected testimonial.

There are so many meaningful ways to become a go-giver, and it’s a great opportunity for each of us to change the world for the better. Read these two books for additional inspiration, then put your go-giver actions to work!

Dr. Christi Hegstad develops strong, confident leaders who make a meaningful difference. Learn more about her coaching work at www.meaning-and-purpose.com, on Facebook at www.facebook.com/MAPIncFan, and via Twitter at www.twitter.com/DrChristiCoach.

The Go-Giver (2007) and Go-Givers Sell More (2010) were published by The Penguin Group.

In addition to those that I offered, what other simple actions might make someone’s day? Share your ideas below. on Facebook, or via Twitter!

Unwrapping The Gift Of Gratitude

Christi Hegstad November 24th, 2014

CLARITY KICKSTART: November 24, 2014

Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.

William Arthur Ward

Coaching Tip for the Week:

Here in the U.S. we celebrate Thanksgiving this week – a time to pay special attention to everything and everyone for which we are grateful. I hope your gratitude list overflows!

This week, don’t just think grateful thoughts – share them. Pull a diligent but quiet employee aside and thank her for her contribution. Call a long-distance friend, even if it feels awkward because it’s been so long since you’ve talked. And of course one of my favorites: Send a handwritten note to someone thanking him for the difference he has made in your life.

Please know how thankful I am for each of you – for your support of MAP Inc., for your inspiring emails, and for the meaningful difference you make in the world. Thank you!

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