You set the goal. You made sure it was specific, realistic, and measurable. You created the action plan and followed through consistently.
The deadline arrives and…you didn’t reach the goal.
Ugh.
We’ve all experienced this disappointment. Sometimes we know what happened; other times it seems beyond explanation. I’ve had new coaching clients admit that they’re hesitant to set goals for fear they may not reach them. (We work through that fear pretty quickly.) 😉
So what do you do when you miss the mark? Wallow? Decide goals aren’t for you? Label yourself a failure and just quit?
I hope not. If that’s the answer, I should have given up on goals years ago!
Let me put this in perspective. Imagine your best friend is overweight and sets a goal to lose 100 pounds in one year. He exercises, works with a nutritionist, and does all the right things. One year later, he has only lost 95 pounds. Is he a failure?
When I pose this scenario in seminars, I hear a resounding, “No!” But he set a goal and didn’t reach it. Why is he not a failure?
Which brings us to the meaning and purpose of goals: It’s not about the goal, it’s not about the destination. It’s about who you become in the process. It’s about your transformation.
In that scenario, yes, your friend fell short of the goal. But he changed his lifestyle. He learned to make better choices. He lost 95 more pounds than he would have had he not set the goal.
And I’d be willing to bet he goes on to lose the additional 5 pounds, achieving the goal – just in a slightly different time frame.
(Now, I can hear some of you saying, “That’s all fine and good. But my job depends on me reaching my goals.” I’ll address this concern in Part 2 here on the blog next week, so be sure to tune in.)
When you don’t reach your goal, take some time to debrief. Ask yourself a few questions, like:
What lessons did you learn that you can take into your next goal?
Was the goal specific? Meaningful? Timely?
What did you do that worked?
What didn’t work?
What helped?
What might help more in the future?
As you move forward, make sure you set specific, meaningful goals that resonate deeply. Break them into consistent, manageable pieces. Take action every day – even (especially!) the days you don’t feel like it.
Make sure you celebrate what you do accomplish, even if it’s not quite to the level you had planned. Then, take a breather, get yourself in a strong and positive mental state, line up your support, and go for your next goal.
Dust yourself off, learn from the experience, and grow forth!
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Dr. Christi Hegstad helps you successfully do what you love! As a Certified Executive and Leadership Coach and the President of MAP Professional Development Inc., she develops strong, confident leaders, helping you flourish with clarity, confidence, and meaningful action.
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