Earlier this year, I agreed to a commitment that ticked all the right boxes for me:
It sounded exciting and fell within my area of expertise. It would challenge my skills in a good way and connect me with awesome people. And, in line with my purpose, it would inspire positive action and make a difference.
My ‘Yes’ was confident, quick, and truly felt right.
Then something weird happened.
Almost immediately upon signing on – still feeling motivated and enthusiastic – I did … nothing.
I didn’t dive into action.
I didn’t even crawl into action.
I did absolutely nothing – unless you can count ‘active procrastination’ as something.
Yet every time I checked in with myself, thinking maybe I had agreed to something I didn’t actually want to do, it still ticked all the right boxes.
I wanted to do this thing. I just wasn’t doing it.
What gives?
Wavering Commitment
Have you ever committed to something that you wanted to do, then found yourself feeling wishy-washy – or even indifferent – towards it?
Numerous factors can play into this, ranging from a values misalignment to fear to burnout to myriad possibilities in between. But in some cases, such as the one I describe above, no real root cause seems apparent, which – especially for achievers – can leave us quite baffled.
After reaffirming I truly wanted to pursue this project and after trying a number of strategies to then get myself to do it, I finally landed on the two that made the biggest difference for me. I share them here in the hopes that they may help you, too.
Two Go-To Practices
First, to no one’s surprise, I made a list. 🙂
Instead of a to-do list or pro/con list, however, this time I made a list of all the things I could do when my commitment begins to waver. This actually turned out to be a pretty extensive list! A few of my bullet points included:
* Remember my purpose. Specifically, why does this project matter, and how does it help me fulfill my purpose?
* Take one small action. One small action can build momentum – and even if it doesn’t, at least I’ve made movement in the right direction.
* Simplify. Consider the (very likely) possibility that I’ve made it harder than it needs to be, and construct ways to bring greater ease, focus, and flow.
* Talk with positive, helpful people.
* Step away for a moment – take a quick walk, cross-stitch for 20 minutes, listen to podcast. Shift perspective for a bit so I can come back with a fresh one.
I actually printed out my list and have it near the front of a binder dedicated to this project. I can’t tell you how helpful this Commitment Boosters list has been!
Second, and I know this can sound like a ‘duh’ tip, but it truly has made a profound difference:
I *decided* to stay committed.
Instead of passively wondering where my commitment went and when it would return and why I felt so darn wishy-washy, I made the conscious decision to be committed to this project – and to boost that commitment whenever I feel it start to waver. (This is where the aforementioned list has proven so useful!)
It kind of feels like fixing a dripping sink: Instead of hearing the constant drip-drip-drip and thinking about how much water it’s wasting and wondering when I’ll finally do something about it, just taking care of it. Then it’s out of my mind completely instead of serving as a constant hum of background noise.
I’m delighted to report that since taking these two actions, my commitment level has dramatically increased, and the project is now almost complete! In fact, if you’re subscribed to my newsletter, you’ll be hearing more about it soon.
What helps you when your commitment to a desired project, goal, or outcome wavers? Share your tips and insights below!