At a meeting recently, I met someone who follows MAP Inc. on Facebook. Her main question for me that day: “Your posts are always so positive – are you really this happy ALL THE TIME?”
It’s not the first time I’ve been asked that question. If you read our e-letters, follow us on Facebook or Twitter, or attend events at which I’m speaking, you’ll see (I hope!) a pattern of positivity, optimism, and happiness. I’ve researched the field extensively and know – and more importantly, experience – the benefits of positive living. Choosing a positive mindset can boost your relationships, business success, health, and pretty much every other area of life.
But am I happy all the time? Are you?
The answer, of course, is no.
Amid the beauty and joy, life also brings “less than happy” experiences. We might consider ourselves happy people but still experience true fear and devastating grief, inexplicable doubt and anger, sadness and mind-boggling frustration. It’s difficult to find happiness when you’re in the midst of a tragic loss. Trust me, I know.
But here’s the thing: by choosing in favor of happiness and focusing on the positive, we can start to raise our “default mode.” There’s much more detail and research behind this, but in a nutshell, raising your happiness set-point allows you to experience those other emotions (which we need – they make for a rich, engaging life, right?) and yet not get lost in the them. When we’ve created an environment – physical, mental, and relational – of positivity, we might crash hard from time to time, but we’ve got the resources in place to lift us up again, and the outlook to keep us moving forward.
So here’s one thing I do: I choose to put positive energy “out there.” Whether it’s through Facebook posts, keynotes, or one-on-one conversations, I strive to uplift and encourage. That’s not to say you’ll never catch me whining – but hopefully, if I’m living in alignment with my values and mission, you won’t catch that very often 😉
The Dalai Lama reminds us that “Happiness is not readymade. It comes from your own actions.” What actions do you choose in favor of happiness?